pix n flix n stix

Chronicle of a failed launch

2010-12-28T21:58:00.000-08:00

Everyone knows that there's this huge blizzard in the northeast.

My parents surprised me & my lil bro less than 2 weeks ago with tickets to go see my grams for New Year's and stay there for two weeks. Little did we know back then that our first flight would be cancelled, moved to a red-eye on wednesday... and that the red-eye would ALSO be cancelled. Except, we were at home when they cancelled the first flight, we were at the airport checking in when they cancelled the red-eye.

I had my hopes up. Already 3 flights had made it to NYC in the day. True, they cancelled the 2 flights prior to my own yet, up until I was getting out of the car in the airport's parking lot, my flight status read: On Time. Not even delayed (which would've been a blessing for me seeing as I had just been picked up from the Maroon 5 concert and missed the afterparty in order to get on time to the airport. That's just mean).

Anywho, flights have been cancelled since sunday so I don't think they'll be any available flights til next year. And even then, will it be worth it to take the flight and come back so soon?

I have no idea.

I called the airline while I was leaving the airport, got on hold for 11mins and closed. Got home and have now been waiting for 22 minutes to try and get on the next flight.

Worst case scenario, I get a flight voucher and seeing as I have no vacations in the foreseeable future (me graduating and starting to work and all), my grams will be getting a free flight to come and see me graduate in April.

I really had my hopes up. Had it all planned out. I'm so disappointed and I'm sure my grams is too, seeing as she was counting on having her grandkids there for New Year's Eve.

Til the next one peeps.

Update: They have the balls to hang up my call after 25 mins on hold. Seriously. I'm getting pissed.

ahem...

2010-10-28T20:02:00.000-07:00

I know it's been a while. Alot has happened. In the state I'm in, I think I can say more bad, than good but, I'd be a fool. Let's just leave it at "alot has happened".

Still, today, I read this in my friend Jezzuka's blog and could not not post it.

Jess, we must be threaded together, at least in essence. Even when we're miles apart, even when we don't talk everyday, you just get me like no one does. Which is why I love you so.

Its title is "On love" and it goes something like this....

"I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times,
in life after life, in age after age forever.
My spell-bound heart has made and remade the necklace of songs
that you take as your gift, wear round your neck in your many forms
in life after life, in age after age forever.
Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, its age-old pain,
its ancient tale of being apart or together,
as I stare on and on into the past, in the end you emerge
clad in the light of a pole-star piercing the darkness of time:
you become an image of what is remembered forever.
You and I have floated here on the stream that brings from the fount
at the heart of time love of one for another.
We have played alongside millions of lovers, shared in the same
shy sweetness of meeting, the same distressful tears of farewell--
old love, but in shapes that renew and renew forever.
Today it is heaped at your feet, it has found its end in you,
the love of all man's days both past and forever:
universal joy, universal sorrow, universal life,
the memories of all loves merging with this one love of ours--
and the songs of every poet past and forever.
--Rabindranath Tagore (1861-1941)"

*is speechless*

deep self-satisfied sigh

2010-07-15T23:29:00.000-07:00

Hiiii :)

Sorry I haven't been blabbing here for a while
although I did give you guys a heads up!

Anywho
I'm done with this college cycle
*yay!*
which means 2 WEEKS of vacations for moi!
(I know, it sounds pathetic but, alas, that's college)
and... it's summer...
so..
meh.
who am I kidding?
I've been practically screaming my vacation plans to you guys!!

I'M LEAVING TOMORROW!!!
WOOHOO!

So yeah.
Felt good to get that out of my chest :)

I leave tomorrow with a heavy heart
knowing I'll leave 2 weeks of get-togethers, beaches & pools
*already my college friends are scheming what they'll do this weekend*
but I'm so so SO excited for my plans :D

Last year I went to Atlanta
*for the first time*
to meet up with Jezzuka
this year I'll be going to B-O-S-T-O-N!!
*for the first time, also*
to meet up with Gelany :D
:D
needless to say, I'm beyond psyched

Not to diminish the other awesome parts of my trip
I'll be going to my future godson's baby shower :) in Providence
*never been there either*
and the usual spots
New York City to visit my cousin
Union City, NJ to see my uncle
Reading, PA to see my grams :)
and I'll try & stop by Philadelphia and see some sites while I'm at it :D

Can't. Frigging. Wait.
T minus 18 hours!!

Books that I've read lately:
- Shade by Jeri Smith-Ready *bawled through most of it but, LOVED IT!*
- Hex Hall by Rachel Hawkins *already awaiting its sequel... funfunfun*
- Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare (ARC) *SHEER GENIUS PEOPLE!!!! PREORDER IT NOW!*
- The Cinderella Society by Kay Cassidy *made me feel all "girl power!" :D*
- Paisely Hanover Kisses & Tell by Cameron Tuttle (ARC) *hahahah :P had so much fun reading this book x)!*
- Dear Anjali by Melissa Glenn Harber (ARC) *broke my heart & made me laugh at the same time, the whole time. Meredith is a quirky, compassionate teen :)*
- Karma Bites by Stacy Kramer & Valerie Thomas (ARC)
I loved this book! It made me feel like I was back in Middle School dealing with the popular cliques in my class and battling my way through the road bumps that come with being 12 and being the eldest child (which I can totally relate to) of a divorced couple (not something I can relate to, thankfully). Franny was hard to love at times and made some pretty selfish choices (as any 12 year old would've done in her shoes *I know I would've*) but, in the end (and with the help of her adorable and timelessly wise grams & after meeting Justin Timberlake :P) she sorted out her issues the right way and learned that with a little personal magic, conversation and time you can solve almost anything :). And, as if that weren't enough, this book has some mighty delicious recipes that any 12 year old could make. Bring out the chef in the girls from early on ;)! I don't know how these two wonderful ladies (Stacy & Valerie) got the musings of a 12 year old so gracefully plastered on paper. I'm 20 and I can't write a book about being 19. But reading this book was like being inside Franny's mind *and let me tell you... It's not all pink in there!*. This is the book you want your little sisters, daughters, nieces, small neighbors, etc. reading this summer. I'm so glad I got an early glimpse at it :D! (Many thanks, Stacy!)

Books I'll read whilst on vacation:
- Beautiful Darknes by Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl (ARC)

Words can't describe how excited I am. Period.

- Linger by Maggie Stiefvater

- and all the other books I'll buy while I'm there *truckloads, people, truckloads*

It's 2:27 a.m. and tomorrow is a long *insert rear part of the human body* day. Getting of stuff, repacking of stuff, hair being done, running around to get to the airport on time and you probably think this is all very boring and stressing but, you know what?

I love going on vacations.

So, why not enjoy the whole ride ;)?

MUCH LOVE!

I'll try and post from the US :)

College work and graduations

2010-06-28T21:01:00.000-07:00

This is just a quick post to assure you I'm not dead and I won't die in the next 3 weeks *fingers crossed*. I have, however, been overcome with too much college work and too little time to do everything I wish I could do (like just sit down and read). I've even had to *gasp* restrain myself from reading anything besides college books to see if I can finish everything on time. I'm entering finals next week and then going on a trip *yay!* to the US (East Coast, baby!) for 2 weeks where I will buy too many books, eat too much junk food and lounge around my grandmother's house =). In the end, it'll be worth the work.

I wanted to share an email I got last week from a *now former* student of mine. Last saturday I graduated my 2nd group of tweens into the teenager program and have been reminiscing ever since *picture below*. This email is a reminder of why I LOVE teaching. It's in spanish *even though I teach an ENGLISH program. . . but since she's graduating I'll just let it slide* so, to my lovely non-spanish speaking followers, if you don't understand it click on the translate button in the right hand sidebar. (For those who do speak spanish, bear in mind that this is a 12 year old's email so yes, the grammar sucked but I had to fix it a bit so the translator could translate properly).*P.D.: the translator is being iffy and says it won't translate english-english (apparently it doesn't recognize the parragraph in spanish so.. Ctrl+C and head on to translate.google.com)

Hola! Como estas?, espero que bien..

Le escribo esto porque me siento muy feliz de que gracias

a usted y a Dios.. he llegado a Junior 5. *sidenote... The kids were graduating the tween program and took a level test for the teen program, she got a level 5 (which is pretty good!!!) and I'm proud to say some of my other kids got as high as a level 7 (woot!)*

Gracias por todos esos dias de martirio que tuvo conmigo

y con los demas.. por esos consejos que escribia en las Notas

de verdad MUCHAS MUCHAS MUCHAS GRACIAS!

Ojala el semestre que viene.. los niños que estaran con usted

aprendan la leccion que yo acabo de aprender

'' Nunca te dejes llevar de los demas ''

Seguimos en contacto no?

Last day of class

On graduation day *yes... more than half of the boys were missing... I suspect those sleepyheads stayed at home. . .*

Tell The Truth Tuesday

2010-06-15T20:28:00.000-07:00

This idea was borrowed from the fantabulous Elana Johnson

This feels like a 'spilling-my-guts' kinda day

Why?

Because it's been a while since I don't spill my guts

So let's get on with this shindig

1- I'm very irritated right about now. It's not their fault. Maybe they're right and I'm just being too self-righteous.

2- I might be coming down with the flu because SOMEONE got too close to me. Thanks -.-

3- That someone that I mentioned before is my boyfriend. Yes. It's official. And I'm happy. Well, I'm kinda happy considering I might be sick thanks to him >.>

4- Even though I have ample time on my hands [seeing as I quit my morning job months ago *at this point I went over my archives to see if I had posted about that dilemma (to quit or not to quit) only to realize that I was so busy I didn't even post about it. . . *] umm.. where was I.. oh yeah. I have ample time on my hands yet I don't seem to want to do my college work. It's not exactly weird. But I should know better and I should be getting to work.

Otherwise, you'll see a post about 3 weeks from now about how crazy I'm going because I have no time and how much I want the last day of classes to come soon so I can get on a plane and forget about the world. Oh yes, I can almost see myself typing the title already: Final hell week.

5- I miss my friends. No. Not the ones that live here and aren't my besties. Or the ones I'm currently mad at. Or the ones that are here but I barely talk to. Or... hmm.. nope, that's it. I mean the ones that live far away and whom I barely get to talk to anymore due to our crazy schedules =/

6- I can't wait for my internship in August. I'm hoping that it'll be enlightening enough so that I'll just know which path to take in the many paths of Psychology. Right now, I'm between Health Psych, Child Psych or Educational Psych. Maybe I'll just flip a three-sided coin.

7- I just had to put this one on account of it being #7. =)

I feel a lot better. Thanks!~

Oh Blogger where art thou?

2010-06-10T20:41:00.000-07:00

I've been ignoring you Blogger

and for that

I'm sorry.

Not much to report on this side

my TBR pile has grown

rather substantially

to my disdain

seeing as I can't actually read anything without feeling guilty

(because I should be reading my assigned books from class)

[Don't tell anyone but I've found a loophole:

Since I can't actually read anything that isn't for a class

I've begun this audiobook thing. . .

June is audiobook month

*or so says Twitter*

so, I've recently heard White Cat and Ink Exchange

*and LOVED both of 'em*

I hear 'em as I fall asleep

when I'm driving to work

so, techincally, I can't be reading in those times, right?!]

Audiobooks rock.

On the home front

Mom had another surgery last week

*she's great and bugging already*

nothing too mayor

lil bro's off of school

which means he'll be lounging around the house

and pestering me 'til no end

College-wise

I'm halfway through this cycle already

[It's been a rough ride and it promises to get rougher]

and that just gets me more and more excited about my summer trip to the US:D

which will begin *literally* the second I finish my last class

*YIPEE!*

On an educational side-note

I went to bed yesterday around 3AM

why?

I was browsing around some college sites

looking for graduate programs

*I feel oh so grown up ;) NO MORE UNDERGRAD soon!!!*

and have, so far, narrowed it down to these

I also checked out the dorms

and picked out my faves

*I was night daydreaming about what my grad experience would be like*

even though Harvard's program is SERIOUSLY drool-worthy

as a full package, I've always have a soft spot for U of Penn

specially so because that means I'll be in driving distance from my grams =)

*which has been the plan all along*

Hopefully

by this time next year I'll be blogging about the scholarship process

and how well I'll have done so far

*fingers crossed*

This weekend promises

no fun reading

some fun hearing ;)

a very very very awaited proposal *I'm positively squealing about it*

and TONS upon TONS of homework -.-'

yay?

Toodles!~

hey there...

2010-05-25T23:42:00.000-07:00

Wow...
I have new followers =)!
*waves hello*
for all of you guys and gals
even though it has seemed like so in some of my posts
this is -not- a book blog
*sorry to disappoint*
although I do blog about my bookish ways =)

for example
I've been reading TOO MUCH lately
you might say:
'one can never read too much, Alannah'
to which I'd say:
'when I don't wanna do college work because Cassel is close to figuring things out... you know it's TOO MUCH'
*Cassel Sharp is the hot MC of Holly Black's latest novel, White Cat... I heard the audiobook in 2 days. Flat. (7 hours worth of YA goodness)*

also
my to-be-read list is growing exponentially
it's not even funny how my wallet is looking at it
*my wallet will be suffering a huge blow this summer when I walk through the doors at The Strand [dreamy sigh]*
and my to-be-read pile is a whole 'nother thing
just LOOK at it

[Disclaimer: 'Paper Towns' is Nadz's and the 'Kissed by an Angel' 3-in-1 book is Dals'. Also, I have about 5 books waiting for me in Kindle and 3 incoming books in the mail *sigh*]

ALSO!!!!
and this pisses me off a bit
my teachers have put it on themselves to assign us novels this cycle
like, seriously
assigned reading?
that is so high school -.-
anytime I have to read a book for a class
it automatically makes me repel the book
I've read about 3 books since my teachers assigned me the books
I could've just read the assigned books and gotten it over with right?
NOT!
I'm a procrastinator at heart
*plus, they're not so appealing to my literary palate*

Talking about literary stuff...

Book Expo America (aka BEA) is this week.

I'm sobbing on the inside everyday.

Just thinking about all the awesomeness that will be there, just waiting for someone to get it. Clockwork Angel, Beautiful Darkness, Karma Bites, Shade, Sea... and so many more that I can't even remember. It's a reader's PARADISE!

*if any of my new followers is currently at BEA and reading this post (which I doubt because, if I were at BEA, I would be nowhere NEAR a laptop. My head would be buried in a book or out partying with some authors :D) please feel free to snag me any of the before mentioned ARCs and send them to me ASAP! =P*

I diverge from the original point....
which was that:
this is not a book blog.

My apologies to my faithful readers
I haven't actually blogged in a while
but, in my defense, neither have YOU
*points fingers... you know who you are!*

also *plus, in addition... I need to broaden my vocabulary... you'd think all that reading would've stuck on me...*
it's not like I have much to report on my personal stuff

There's this teeny thing I have yet to mention here
about a certain person I'm kinda, maybe, supposed to be dating
I'll leave a clue and report back when it's official
*if we ever agree on a date and stick by it xD! We're picky people when it comes to dates, it has to be perfect =)! Plus [again with the same word], who's waiting for us anyways?*
Here's the hint:

Easy peasy, right? =)
I'm having such a blast...!

College will be over soon.
It pains me to admit it but, I'm going to have to actually grow up.

Ugh.

I've got my internship spot secured for August :)
I'll be shadowing one of my fave teachers in her therapies over at a local children's hospital
*i'm so PSYCHED! [pun intended]*
and I've also started gathering all the stuff I'm gonna be needing to apply for *the* scholarship next year.

I can barely contain myself.

If I score that scholarship, I can die a happy woman.
I won't know what to do with myself after I actually get it, though. I've been focusing half my life on getting my grades for the undergrad scholarship and then getting the grades for the masters scholarship that I have yet to form an actual plan as to what will happen AFTER the scholarships wear out.

I'll leave that for the next blabbering post.

To conclude, here's the trailer for Karma Bites *remember that ARC I said I'd gotten in my last bookish post [you can spot the ARC in the picture on this post... next to Paper Towns]? Well, the lovely Vania got her thing on and did the trailer*

YouTubing..

2010-05-16T23:35:00.000-07:00

In honor of YouTube's 5th anniversary

*I am a Google FREAK people... obsessed, really*

I'm gonna post their anniversary vid

and the link to the 'My YouTube story' playlist

*confession... this YouTubing has been caused by my country's election weekend. We've been on full election lockdown (in my house) since yesterday and 'til the last vote is counted... My fellow countrypeople are known to get rowdy when it comes to politics, so it's better to be safe than sorry. So that would explain the excessive twittering, facebooking and YouTubing.*

We take online stuff for granted on a daily basis

but the power that lies in YouTube is HUGE

just check out these people's stories and see why I'm saying this

(it's really inspiring stuff... pretty cool!)

First off... here's the anniversary vid

*Happy Birthday YouTube!*

Some of the 'My YouTube story's are pretty funny

like the famous NigaHiga

*he cracks me up ALL the time*

but some of them are kind of touching...

inspiring!

Like this guy... Jason Carpenter

he recorded his fight with myeloma on YouTube

and even though he thought it was the end

it turns out he's still alive, years later

and lives to vlog the tale!

Also Only Medhi

who was fighting against political war in Iran

There are many more that are very cool and inspiring and CUTE vids

So... check 'em out!

YouTube's Five Year Channel

aaaand...

on a sidenote...

Jackson Pearce posted this jewel today also:

*i'm STILL laughing*

Have a nice week, peeps!~

ARC's, ARC's and other bookish stuff...

2010-05-13T22:30:00.000-07:00

for my non-book blogger-ish readers

an ARC is an Advanced Reading Copy

*note the ADVANCED part*

for me, an ARC is sheer joy

i recently received an ARC of 'Karma Bites'

it's a Middle Grade book from Stacy Kramer and Valerie Thomas

and so far i've had so much fun reading it!!!

*yes.. i'm like a middle grader inside... deal with it!*

check out a sample chapter of the book HERE

now.. even though i have a to-be-read list

my most wanted ARC's are as follows:

1. Beautiful Darkness by Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl

You must be tired of hearing me speak about Beautiful Creatures

well

deal with it

if you had read the book

you would understand

Beautiful Creatures is a paranormal/gothic/romance young adult novel and it even has some american history mixed in. I read it in January and have been hooked on the Caster world ever since. The best part? It was told from a guy's PoV! And, it wasn't even written by a guy, nope. The master minds behind the book are my fave YA authors Kami Garcia & Margie Stohl =) *love 'em!*

Now, Beautiful Darkness is gonna be out in OCTOBER. Imagine having to wait for 10 MONTHS to find out what happens next on Glee. That's what it feels like right now. Which is why I was eager to jump at the first chance to get one of those lovely ARC's.

Twilight Moms and Caster Girls are hosting an ARC contest!! *squee!* So click here for more info on how to win it!

2. Linger by Maggie Stiefvater

If you read the post about me getting Shiver and if you've read Shiver yourself, you must know where I'm coming from. Maggie is sheer genius and left me panting for more Sam&Grace even before I had finished Shiver!

Truth be told, I've entered every single contest on the blogosphere to try and get my hands on an ARC but, alas, no luck YET! Maggie herself is hosting an awesomesauce *thanks Elana for the word ;)* contest.

Easiest contest on the world really *click it to find out*... it's just spreading the trailer around. The trailer itself is a work of art, made by Maggie HERSELF. I have no idea where she finds the time, really.

Here's the trailer *which only makes me wanna read it MORE AND MORE! so. uh. i guess it's doing its job.*

Pretty nifty, huh? =)
*if you win it, you MUST let me read it :) Cool?*

3. Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare

Ok, who has read the Mortal Instruments series? Show of hands, come on. Ok, good. Those of you who haven't read it can go out and BUY IT! NOW! What are you waiting for? Need the names? City of Bones, City of Ashes, City of Glass. SCRAM!

Sheesh. Poor innocent readers. They're missing out on SO much fun!!! I read the whole series in a breeze in my last vacations only to regret it later. I miss Jace. Jace. Jace. Jace. I feel like repeating it over and over like Clary does =P!

Anywho, Clockwork Angel is the 1st in the prequel series to TMI, called The Infernal Devices. If you read TMI, 'nuf said. If not, what are you doing reading this and why aren't you out buying it or reading it?! GO!

4. Shadow Hills by Anastacia Hopcus

First time i found out about this book was through Mundie Moms. MM's is a fansite for TMI, made by MOMS! TMI is so frigging awesome it has a fansite for MOMS! Do you see why you need to read it?! Uh... back on the topic at hand, next time i heard about it was when the very talented Vania made the trailer for the book a few months back.

If you wanted more... Then check out the sample chapter

Pure YA goodness.

When it comes out *soon soon soon* you need to read it! Or, if you wanna snag an ARC before, check out this contest on Anastasia's blog

If you, like me, can't wait... The contest is the answer to all your problems ;) *with some luck...*.

That's it for today peeps... College is reeling me in. If you wanna know about the contests going on in the book-blogosphere, check out my contests page for current contests!

G'luck!

Do the write thing for Nashville!

2010-05-07T10:41:00.000-07:00

If you haven't heard
Nashville, Tenessee has recently been the victim of heavy rains
and it is/was flooded
there are thousands of people that have been affected by this flood
and everyone is trying to do their part and help

Artists like Ke$ha and Taylor Swift have donated
the CMA music festival is gonna split the proceeds
so why can't authors and agents pitch in?

That's why RIGHT NOW there are auctions going on in:
Do the write thing for Nashville
books, queries, book swag like tshirts, nail polish, etc. are being auctioned off
and all the proceeds are going towards helping out the flood victims

I think it's an AWESOME thing to do
and i'm going to try and get a bid in for some stuff
although, i must warn you... there are some very persistent bidders!

The 1st day already raked in around $1200 dollars which is great!
But they need more!!!

Bear in mind that it is for a very good cause
and go ahead and BID!!!

Toodles, peeps!~

Honorary Caster Girl =)

2010-05-06T19:28:00.000-07:00

Remember i told you guys and gals about a certain fansite i'd be helping out in?

Well, if you can see the sidebars
you must know that i LOVE Beautiful Creatures
It's one of my favorite books
it introduced me to the YA lit world
and i have tons of new books and friends to show for that :)

So, when presented with the opportunity to help out in the fansite
Caster Girls
I jumped at the idea
*right after I was done with college of course*

Here i present to you the post featured on the site
I hope you all check out the book if you haven't
and when you do
swing by the site
hop by the forums
and spread the BC love =)

Today I want to introduce my friend Alannah who will be helping out with the Caster Girls & Boys forum. She has graciously agreed to help out and be a part of the team. So here she is in her own words:

Hey, casters! I’m Alannah. Midterms (and then finals a week after) didn’t let me help out before but, I’m finally on vacations! I live in the Dominican Republic and aside from being Dominican by birth, I’m a Caster Girl by passion.

I’ve been stalking (yes, stalking, I admit it) Kami & Margie for about 3 months, right after I read Beautiful Creatures. I’ve been in love with YA lit and the Caster world ever since. I must admit I’m a newcomer to all of this so, baby steps =)!

I’m a psychology student and a Twitter-holic (@alannah7). I have a personal blog which I don’t write in that often, guilty as charged. But, in exchange, I’ll be writing up a storm on the forums so, see you there!

*Props to my Dad for drawing on my hand! Yes, I am THAT artistically challenged!*

Thanks so much Alannah! Everyone please welcome her to the site and the forum.

TGIT

2010-04-20T13:28:00.000-07:00

Yup...

You read right!!!

Thank God it's TUESDAY!

Why tuesday, you ask?

Well...

It means that i turned in every final

It also means i turned in all my grade reports

and THAT means

i'm COMPLETELY FREE!

ON VACATIONS!

No joke.

I forgot what it felt like to be on vacations...

Considering my last vacation period was one measely week

*although i enjoyed that week even so*

this feeling of nothing to do for TWO FULL WEEKS

is nothing short of amazing

'don't you have a job?'

yes. i do.

but, i must remind you that i love my job

so i don't care =D

plus, i only work 9 hours a week xD

1.5 hours mondays/wednesdays

3 hours fridays/saturdays

so i don't actually feel like i'm working!

another reason to be ecstatic that i'm on vacation:

i just got Cassandra Clare's The Mortal Instruments series

*props to Nadia for swapping me TMI in exchange for Shiver and BC! enjoy ;)*

add that to Melissa Marr's Wicked Lovely

*which i got for FREE on Amazon! go get it while you can in Amazon or B&N!*

and a ton of episodes from Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy, Dr. House, Life Unexpected, One Piece *not my choice..........*, etc, etc.

and i've got myself some epic vacations ahead =D

also.

it's TUESDAY!

also known as GLEEDAY!!!

today is the Power of Madonna episode...

can't

wait

mmhmm.. what else?

oh yeah, i've got 2 A's posted already.

can i be happier than this?

heck yes i can.

i'm spending my summer vacations in USA =)

there's just something about spending july in the US, right Jessy?

my stops this year include:

Boston (see if i can see Ms. Gelz), Providence (to my GODSON'S baby shower... yes... i'm going to be a GODMOTHER! like in the fairytales!), New York (to catch up with the summer releases by shopping at Strand*duuuh*), New Jersey (to visit the fam), Reading, PA (to visit grams =D) and maybe Philly (Liberty Bell and such).

I'm ecstatic!

suddenly, all my hard work in this cycle feels far behind =)

mmhm what else...

oh yesss...

i'm signing up to help out in a certain fansite...

stay tuned to check out the revealing post ;)

hmmmm...

there's something else but i'll tell you guys n gals when the time is right ;)

in the meantime

i'll leave you with by far the cutest sonograms i've ever seen...

i present to you my godson: Jadiel Garcia =)

*gushes*

isn't it like a work of art?

i mean look at that head!!!!!

i can see he's gonna look like me ;)

*they always said his mom and I looked like sisters so it could happen! (his mom's my cousin)*

AND LOOK!

HE'S SAYING BYE TO HIS GODMOTHER!

isn't he just gorgeous?

i know.

i can't contain myself!!!!

i <3>

mwahahah!

i might steal him away for a couple of months when he comes to visit next year =)

'til the next one peeps!~

Quick and painless... hopefully

2010-04-04T21:28:00.000-07:00

It's 11:27 and i'm pooped and ready for bed
that alone should let you know how fun/hard these past few weeks have been

if you know me from any other sphere of the internet or real life,
then you MUST know that i've had some visitors staying over my house lately
two very expected and anticipated visitors
my 4 year old and 1 year old cousins
*i would insert a pic here but.. alas... Blogger isn't helping*

they make my day shine no matter how dark it is
which is why i moved earth and sea to be with them at all moments

Holy week was a whole 'nother experience with them
i even went to uncharted grounds: spending Easter weekend away from home
it was amazing =)!

but before Holy week...
i had THE most amazing trip...
got a chance to spend the day with my fave radio talk show hosts
*aka Nashla Bogaert, Ico Abreu, Mauvie Espinosa, Yuri Sosa, Amin Dominguez*
and some local rock stars ;)
*aka: Auro Sonico, Pablo Cavallo, Gnomicko, Chino Sing, Juango Davalos*
and to top it off, we spent the day in one of the most gorgeous parts of the country: Los Haitises
(blogger is still being a pain... if you wanna see the pix click HERE)

of course
one musn't forget everything...
COLLEGE is driving me insane.
seriously.
i thought once i didn't have such a demanding job it would be easier to manage college
NOT!
this cycle is super tough.
and it's taking every grain of me to finish it with good grades
*i'm SO close to the finish line!!!*

that aside
i'm getting my braces taken off this wednesday
YES!

on further news... UPDATED!!!
i won The Cinderella Society by Kay Cassidy
*thanks to Page Turners *
i won Courage in Patience by Beth Felhbaum
*thanks to Sarah =D over @ Sarah's Random Musings *
i won SHIVER by Maggie Stiefvater... STILL SQUEALING!!!
*thanks again to BehindYellowEyes*

i got SHIVER in the mail today =)

i'm so happy!

i won Tender Morsels by Margo Lanagan

*thanks to Through a Glass, Darkly*
and i won a Once was lost by Sara Zarr ARC

*thanks to Fire and Ice Photo*

Yes,.... i know... i'm so frigging lucky =D

Hopefully my luck'll carry on to Heidi Kling's Mystery Book contest and may it carry on to the week she'll be giving out Linger... *pretty please?*

And while you're at it... check out Vania's latest piece of awesomeness: Holly Black's upcoming book White Cat *the trailer*

and ooomph...
i'm tired.
pooped as i said at the beginning
and it's 12:27 AM *not kidding... exactly 1 hour for this measly post >.<*

have a great post-spring-break week!~

Squeelage and authors appreciation Kami&Margie

2010-03-21T23:53:00.000-07:00

I need to squee

A LOT!

i won 'Shiver' by Maggie Stiefvater!

Yes

YES!

I'll finally know what all the hype is about!!!!!!! =D

If you haven't read it or haven't heard of it..

here's the synopsis from Maggie's site

but

here's the awesome site i won it from:

Behind Yellow Eyes

*fansite of the 'Wolves of Mercy Falls' series*

anywho

i can't squee much because my throat gave out in the middle of the Cultura Profetica concert

*kick-ass puertorican reggae/rap/rock band*

but i'll squee and inform the second that book arrives =)

MOVING ON!

this week has been insane

as some of you must've heard/read

but i can't let it pass by without writing about 2 of my fave authors

*drumroll*

presenting the sweetest

most connected to their fans

NYT & international best-selling authors

Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl

I'm sure you must all be tired by now of hearing me speak of Beautiful Creatures...

well..

i promise not to talk so much about BC...

*now... Beautiful Darkness is coming out this fall... so... we'll talk later ;)*

but... have i told you about these awesome gals?

Why i DON'T appreciate them

*better start by the shorter list, right?*

- not letting me sleep the day i got Beautiful Creatures

- not letting me study the day i got Beautiful Creatures

- not letting me watch TV the day i got Beautiful Creatures *thank god for sidereel*

(notice how i only wrote 'the day'? well... i couldn't put the book down. literally. i read it in a day xD)

now... on to the good stuff =)

i LOVE them because:

- their book Beautiful Creatures is now one of my favorite books

- their book introduced me to the YA world... therefore expanding my reading horizon

- through their 'Scavenger Hunt' and 'Unlock the Curse' contests i met some great peeps =)

- they are going to write a whole Caster series *i ADORE them for that...*

*check out the 2nd book's (Beautiful Darkness) cover here*

- their book has one of the coolest fansites --> Caster Girls

*check out the forums!*

and that's just stuff about their book...

did i mention they are sweet, funny as heck, act like sisters *although Margie might point out something about Kami's height ^-^*, are very connected to their fans and manage to write, be mothers and tour all over the world while doing that?

they are super people in my book.

wanna see what i mean?

tweet them:

Kami

Margie

and then let the fireworks roll out =)

aaand that's a wrap!

toodles!~

Tell The Truth Tuesday

2010-03-16T22:51:00.000-07:00

This post was inspired by Elana Johnson's TTTT post

*hilarious!*

So... the point is to tell some truths each week

*be happy... this means i'll be posting frequently!*

Here are my truths for this week:

Truth: i email myself. a lot. *like Elana*

Why? each day i use my laptop less and less... and my BB more and more

*to the dismay of most people around me*

i email myself things i need to do the next time i'm on my laptop

(blogs to read, videos to see, tweets i need to read one more time, etc.)

thankfully, though, i get more emails besides mine!

Truth: i sleep with 8 pillows.

insane.

i know.

i spend more time trying to get the perfect spot between them

than actually falling asleep

*thanks to my sleeping jutsu... it's been working for 2 months now =D*

BUT!

when i do find the spot

man, oh man is it worth it....

Truth: i should have posted my 2nd AAW post.

but this day has brought me down so much i'm too tired to write it.

and i'm also afraid i'll run out of authors i TRULY love by the end of the week.

Truth: although this day has brought me down tons there was light at the end of the tunnel.

school is wearing me down.

exhibit A: i was in the hospital on friday due to dehidration *aka: sheer exhaustion*

this week is shaping up to be worse.

and i had such hopes for this being a resting week from last week's hell -.-

BUT!

i have some news i'll be sharing soon

and i got the confirmation email today

and i'm so freaking excited!

*fingers crossed...*

hopefully college will let me pursue this...

Truth: nothing makes me feel more alive than having TOO much stuff to do.

i blame my mother.

'nuf said.

Truth: my brother's a pest of a child.

Truth: even though i know i shouldn't, i want candy.

*it's 2AM*

Truth: i should now be sleeping.

need to get up early and get my behind to college for a project.

'til the next one!~

*did you like it =D?*

Author Appreciation Week - JK Rowling and Ann Brashares

2010-03-15T20:28:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here at work thinking what to post…
the lovely Heidi Kling
author of the upcoming summer hit, Sea
came up with the brilliant idea of the Author Appreciation Week
as a way for fans to express their feelings towards their fave authors
*click here to see her initial post*
*and here for her own AAW post: Monday Mavericks*

Now, I woke up this morning to see TONS of new posts and tweets about #AAW
Just goes to show the power of twitter

As I tweeted I would follow the initiative
here I am posting
yet, I'm at loss for words
*or actually holding them back*

First thing is that…
I'd love to post about some of the authors I tweet to daily…
some of the authors that are shaping the YA world right now
*although I'll post about a pair… later*
like Heidi Kling, Maggie Stiefvater, Diana Peterfreund, Jackson Pearce, Carrie Ryan, Melissa Marr, Kimberly Derting, Lauren Oliver, Cassandra Clare, Sarah Rees Brenna, Holly Black and I could go on and on and on….
but, alas… I haven't read *or finished reading in Lauren Oliver's case* their books YET!
*check out my to-be-read page, on top*
so I'll stick to the authors that have shaped my reading experience so far
*and they are as awesome as the ones mentioned before*

Reading to me is an escape
so I try to read things that have nothing to do with real life
no historic novels
no real-life stories
and in school, we had to read a lot
tons of real-life stories
tons of historic novels

so you might understand the fact that I hated reading
up until January 2003

My little brother's school had assigned him an essay about Harry Potter 4.
I had seen the Harry Potter movies, and loved them
but it had never crossed my mind to actually read it

So when they bought it in my house, I read a few pages with my lil bro
to help him out and such
and liked it.
loved it.
obsessed with it.

So I read HP3 *in Spanish, mind you* from my school library
and loved it.
re-watched the movies again
and knew that I'd have to read the books
as some parts mentioned in the books were missing.

I proceeded to pester my parents for months on end to buy the books
until they agreed
and I read them in less than a week J

after that I was hooked on Harry Potter
pre-ordered books 5 through 7
and read them in one day each.

and while reading
I could smell the butterbeer…
feel the warmth from the candles in the great hall
fly through London atop the hippogriff

And thus my love for books was born =)

After that
I got interested in other books
I kept reading on and on
and haven't stopped since =P

So, to my dearest J. K. Rowling
for giving me my love of reading
and transporting me to other realms through her books
I appreciate *cough*LOVE*cough* you =D

Now…
after HP… I was on fire!
I kept reading and reading and reading
and then stumbled upon Ann Brashares' series:
The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants

I thought I'd never like a seemingly real story
or even be interested in reading it
*because of what I said before*
WRONG!

My school peep Jessy and I devoured those books in days
and waited with bated breath for 'Forever in Blue'
her last book in the SotTP series *tears*

I felt as if Carmen, Bee, Tibby and Lena were my friends
my sisters
and I cried through every heartbreak
and jumped for every win =D

I felt like an insider in their world
and considering the fact that I was going through my teen years whilst reading them
that meant a lot to me

So, for showing me that I can read outside my box
and still make it an escape out of my daily routine
and enjoy it
for giving me sisters when I only needed friends
I appreciate thee =)

Til the next one!~

could it be true?

2010-03-11T21:42:00.000-08:00

is she really posting something =O?!

amazing.

i know.

well..

my life's been chaotic the past couple of...

months, was it?

oh well...

i don't even keep track anymore

*at this point i stopped writing for like an hour*

(Blame it on Gaga and her crazy new video)

*ok, ok. TWO hours. i had to do some research to prove i'm not crazy. that is just Gaga.*

anywho

my gorgeous followers

since my last post

i have been on vacation

and back in class again

i did post about my 20th birthday

*ok... an attempt at a post*

and i must admit i had a blast :)

after much e-debate over what dress to pick

i finally got one fit for a night of dancing

in that picture, i was doing the

i'm-getting-a-piece-of-that-yummy-cake-i'm-so-excited birthday dance =)

and this is how much of that cake i actually ate:

and to top it off

i couldn't even it THAT one peacefully!

*notice the vultures... i mean... my friends*

but all in all..

i had a great time

TONS of people showed up to have din-din with me

and then we danced what was left of the night away =)

*if you want to see more pix, here's the link*

now

after that

college showed me it still had some fight in it

and gave me a swift kick in the brains

after that

my life's revolved around:

college

work

family

and of course my lovely friends

there have been some hectic periods

i.e. this week

in which i cursed the skies and wondered

will i really finish college?

am i going to get out of this in one piece?

like last week

when i had to be ms. president

*oh yeah. in case you didn't know:

i'm president of the psych students' committee*

sheesh. how many double letters can a word HAVE!?

back to the story

i had to run around and try and sell the idea of being an intec student

to high school seniors from schools all around the country

so i basically practiced a speech and gave it to about 140 kids

in 2 days

that was in the morning

afternoons

i was back to being just another student

who had to take a test

which test?

evel-knievel's test from hell

now

evel-knievel is what i call a teacher of mine

i mean

she really is evil

let's forget about the fact that she didn't actually go to class for 2 full weeks

so we started uber-late

but no

she also happens to have a thing for publicly humiliating everyone in my class

by that i mean bringing out every 'fault and error' out in the open

*notice the '' every single word you say is a fault and error in her book*

and out of all the classpeeps

she just loves picking on me

*and no. i am not overreacting or being egotistical. you can ask around.*

further proof as to why she is evel-knievel

she POPPED a midterm on us

yes

A MIDTERM

how do you do that?

merely a week after the first test

she goes on about the class in her normal evil sarcastic ways

and then proceeds to hand out what we assumed was a homework sheet

NOT

it was a full fledged exam

she even made a mini-contract at the end that read:

I ___________________ have agreed to take this test on march 11th, 2010 and let it be worth 17/34 points of my midterm test.

that is not a nice way to teach

i'm not sure i'm getting away with a 4.0 this trimester

and that is just one of my classes

for further rambling and whining about college

and the crazy stunt my teacher'll pull next week:

stay tuned

same channel.

bright news: i'm slipping my daily fits at college and life by reading.

later on i'll make a page *those tabs on the top of the blog* about my to-be-read pile

(oh yeah... i changed the layout. i got bored of the old one ^.^)

and this is where i say bye

*cuz i should be sleeping... it's 4am*

and promise to try and post this weekend

because i didn't say half of what i wanted to say

ugh

and this was a long post too

ugh

are you still here with me?

show me some love if you finished

*actually... i should show YOU love for sticking through this post x)*

oh well

we'll see

toodles!~

Inspiring vlog...

2010-03-08T21:38:00.000-08:00

As you must've noticed by now...

I'm really into the YAlit world =)

It's been just under 2 months since i read Beautiful Creatures

and about 5 months since i REALLY started tweeting

*check out my timeline on the sidebar*

then i followed BC's authors Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl

which was my entrypoint into the YA community

*that last link takes you to my twitter list of authors and YA peeps :)*

and i've met tons of YA fans and exchanged words with some awesome YA authors too...

i've been inspired to read around a hundred books already

*yet haven't started due to the small availability in DR and small amount of time college gives me*

I've also entered *and won a few* contests looking for the next book on my 'to be read' pile..

(check out the giveaways posted on my 'ongoing contests' section in the sidebar)

The contest i'm relating this post to is a 'Hex Hall' giveawayby Victoria Schwab

*props to Vania for the contest link*

Now... the requirement is to put the next vlog into my post...

I HIGHLY encourage you to see this video

it's very inspiring and awesome in its own way

and it speaks a bit about being a 'YA Rebel'

and why we shoud all try to be rebels in our lives

Kudos Victoria :)

Grey's Anatomy

2010-02-27T21:14:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day Massacre: http://www.megavideo.com/?d=BE81W05Z

"YOU WERE MY BEST FRIEND. My best friend who i could tell everything to. And now you won't even look at me."

24 minutes, 44 seconds --> Exact location of the scene.

*and that's where the similarities of G's A and my life end... none of what it says after 24'57'' is of interest. Although... if you don't watch G's A, i fully recommend it. No, it is not just another medical drama.*

Yep.

That's it, folks.

Toodles.

Unlock the curse

2010-02-21T19:50:00.000-08:00

Yes yes guys...

i know.

i need to post.

college is insane.

i will.

*i still love y'all*

anywho.

in the meantime:

here's an awesome contest i'm participating in...

Beautiful Creatures: Unlock the curse

If you have any way of helping me gain extra points *as in, posting a link in your FB page or in your blog, or joining Caster Girls, or adding Kami Garcia or Margaret Stohl or joining my team through Twitter* please do... it won't take a liver out of you... and it won't cost you much time or money YET! it might help my team win some awesome prizes :)!

Let me know if you helped so i can tally up the points.

Yes.

I know.

I don't post anything and then i post THIS?!

But don't worry... all in its due time ;)!

Much love!

there are 20 years to go....

2010-02-07T09:04:00.000-08:00

i see it fit to at least make an entry today

two decades :)

i'll post something better later on

for the record: i had a BLAST!

cheers!~

Cattel's 16 personality factors and them some

2010-01-07T22:18:00.000-08:00

This is a truly long post about an assignment i had in college

see... i was supposed to auto-administer cattel's infamous 16PF test

for my psych elements class

so i did

and now i can see why i used to talk crap about my school's psych

when she gave us the results to this same test

and now i also see she was just writing out what the test indicated

as contradicting as it is... *And trust me, it is very contradicting*

then again... us humans... we aren't simple

and then again... those tests... aren't 100% image of the person that's taking it

still

i felt compelled to post out the results

seeing as it took me a long time to do the test

even longer to grade it and check the results

and then to get the secondary factors it took me like 3 hours -.-

here it goes!

My personality... according to Cattel... with some personal opinions *between stars*

so.. the important stuff is in bold.. the rest is to explain the important..

the rest is all blah blah blah -.-

*in spanish... sorry guys! translator tool on the right bar ;)*

Factor A: sin definicion. *reservada versus abierta*

Factor B: Inteligencia alta, pensamiento abstracto, brillante (mucha capacidad mental para los estudios)

Rapida en su comprension y aprendizaje de las ideas. Existe alguna relacion con el nivel cultural y con la viveza mental.

Factor C: Afectada por sentimientos, poco estable emocionalmente, turbable (poca fuerza del ego)

Presenta poca tolerancia a la frustracion; cuando las condiciones no son satisfactorias es voluble, plastica, evade las necesidades y llamadas de la realidad, neuroticamente fatigada, displicente *whaaa*, de emocion y turbacion facil, activa cuando se encuentra insatisfecha; presenta sintomas neuroticos (fobias, alteraciones del sueno, quejas psicosomaticas,etc.)

Factor E: (i know! no D factor!) Dominante, independiente, agresiva, competitiva, obstinada (dominancia)

Dogmatica, segura de si misma, de mentalidad independiente. Tiende a ser austera, autorreguladora, hostil y extrapunitiva, autoritaria (en el manejo de los demas), y a hacer caso omiso de toda autoridad.

Factor F: Descuidada (confiada a la buena ventura), animada e impulsiva, entusiasta (surgencia)

Jovial, activa, charlatana *xD*, franca, expresiva, acalorada y descuidada. Frecuentemente se le escoge como lider electo. Puede ser impulsiva y de actividad imprevisible o cambiante.

Factor G: sin definicion. *despreocupada versus escrupulosa*

are u still there? hold on!!!

Factor H: Emprendedora, socialmente atrevida, espontanea, no inhibida (parmia)

Sociable, atrevida, dispuesta a intentar nuevas cosas, espontanea, de numerosas respuestas emocionales. Su indiferencia (falta d verguenza) le permite soportar sin fatiga el toma y daca del trato con la gente y las situaciones emocionales abrumadoras. Sin embargo, puede despreocuparse por los detalles, e invertir mucho tiempo charlando. Tiende a ser emprendedora y estar activamente interesada por el otro sexo *xD*

Factor I: Sensibilidad dura, confiada en si misma, realista (harria)

Practica, realista, varonil *reaally?*, independiente, responsable y, a la vez, esceptica de las elaboraciones culturales subjetivas. A veces es inamovible, dura, cinica, pagada de si misma *self payed? what is that supposed to mean?!* Tiende a mantener al grupo trabajando sobre unas bases practicas, realistas y acertadas.

Factor L: *where's J and K?* Suspicaz, engreida, dificil de enganar (protension)

Desconfiada y ambigua. A menudo se encuentra complicada con su propio yo, le gusta opinar sobre si misma *well i'll say... is that wrong? =/* y esta interesada en la vida mental intima. Suele actuar con premeditacion; es despegada de los otros y colabora deficientemente con el grupo.

Factor M: Practica, cuidadosa, convencional, regulada por realidades externas, formal y correcta (praxernia)

Suele mostrarse ansiosa por hacer las cosas correctamente, atenta a los problemas practicos y sujeta a los dictados de lo que es evidentemente posible. Se preocupa por los detalles *i do... neurotically...*, capaz de serenidad en situaciones de emergencia, aunque a veces es poco imaginativa *try NEVER!*

you're still reading... you must really love me =D

Factor N: Franca, natural, sencilla, sentimental (sencillez)

Suele ser sencilla, sentimental, llana, poco sofisticada. Se le satisface facilmente *totally true... xD i'm the happiest person alive with an ice cream :)* y se muestra contenta con lo que le acontece *i am a very happy person, usually..*; natural; espontanea, poco refinada y torpe *hey! i resent that >.>*

Factor O: sin definicion. * Apacible y segura de si versus aprensiva y preocupada*

Factor Q1 *dude... there are more letters in the alphabet, what's with the skipping and putting numbers?!*: Analitico-critica, liberal, experimental, de ideas libres y pensamiento abierto (radicalismo)

Suele interesarse por cuestiones intelectuales y dudar de los principios fundamentales. Es esceptica y de espiritu inquisitivo en las ideas, sean tradicionales o nuevas. Suele estar bien informada *thanks to twitter, the newspaper and facebook xD*, poco inclinada a moralizar y mas a preguntarse por la vida en general y a ser mas tolerante con las molestias y el cambio.

Factor Q2: Dependiente, buena companera y de facil union al grupo (adhesion al grupo)

Prefiere trabajar y tomar decisiones con los demas, le gusta y depende de la aprobacion social *guilty as charged =/* Tiende a seguir las directrices del grupo, incluso mostrando falta de decisiones personales. No es necesariamente gregaria por decision propia, sino que necesita del apoyo del grupo.

Factor Q3: sin definicion. *autoconflictiva versus controlada y socialmente adaptada*

Factor Q4: sin definicion. *Relajada versus tensa*

DONE! *for the moment... mwahahahaha!*

now... by this point i've lost half of the people that started to read the post xD!

i know...

i might've done the same had i been in your shoes...

still!

it's an interesting thing *at least for my career... you don't know what career i'm in?! what are you doing reading this then!... you poor thing xD!*

and since i'm tired of typing...

i'll post the "secondary factors" later

those secondary factors were harder to get

and say even harder truths -.-

alas...

'tis enough for the night

on my personal front

been peeved with the 'rents for a while

grams is leaving on monday =/

which means that things with the 'rents won't turn out any better after that T.T

have had some disturbing thoughts cross my mind thanks to a subject i hold dear

so i'll try to sort them out correctly instead of just dumping them out

they're rather jaunting, if i might say so...

finished reading beautiful creatures and i recommend it to anyone!

*big fun...*

my present season can be wrapped up in a gorgeous necklace *props to my mate and his sis :P* and a puzzle... yes... a puzzle... gotta keep the mind moving!

birthday's coming up quickly.. and so is V-day so.. present season ain't over just yet ;)

and oh!

i almost forgot!

Happy 2010 readers :)

i hope this year brings you tons of love and moments of happiness

may you follow through your resolutions

and if you're like me and didn't make any xD

may you find this year's purpose

and may it be a good one :)

i hope that unlike me you had a blast welcoming the new year

and that your holidays were holly :)

tons of love!!! :)

til the next one!~

tweet peeps

2009-12-21T00:37:00.000-08:00

yes i know

i'm a lazy bum

but seeing as it's so much easier to type > 140 words

*plus i have an app for my bb for tweeting =D*

i'm suggesting y'all get a twitter and follow me =D

yes

i will blog

but if u wanna know my moment-to-moment stuff

then twitter's ur best pal ;)

q' me sigan los buenos: http://twitter.com/alannah7

tons of love :)!

expecting grams anytime soon =D!

*but then again... if u followed me on twitter, u'd already know that ;)*

lucky

2009-12-15T22:44:00.000-08:00

*bear with me here...

after having read some truly superb posts from my dear *and "new" as far as this blog knows* bf... i've been intimidated as to writing a really good post.

ok.

this ain't that really good post.

-.-

sorry.

still...

i felt the need to post

my fingers have been itching for a couple of weeks

and i just faced the truth that he's better than me at the "really nice n sweet post" thing.

you win.

*for now...*

anywho...

after everything's that's been going on lately

everything i've heard

i realize that i'm lucky

and not just lucky in the normal sense

and by normal i mean

lucky to be alive

lucky to have food on my table everyday

lucky to have both my parents

lucky to be in a great college

lucky to be in college. period!

i have to say i'm lucky in other parts too...

lucky to have at least one grandmother alive

and to see her next week =D

*highlight of the year... xmas in DR with grams!~*

maybe i'm so self-centered that i didn't notice before

or maybe it really is as big as i think it is

but this seems to be the year for grandparents to go.

god *or la mayimba as a teacher of mine says* must be planning one heck of a reunion up there..

a big number of my friends have lost a grandparent this year.

and if i hadn't said it verbally before... i say it this way...

i am very sorry for your loss.

from a very personal PoV, it's a very sad thing to go thru

lucky to have such great friends

and this is crucial ppl...

after having some random talks with random ppl about friendship

i realized that even though, yes, i know a lot of ppl

i only have a handful of friends

*u must be thinking, "and u realize this NOW? how naive of u!"

nope...

i do not realize this now

i've known that only some ppl are called friends

but what i realized is that even amongst those i called friends

only a few actually deserve the spot.

and those that do, i love more than they know ^.^

and i couldn't imagine my life without them

i'm lucky to have very down to earth, complete parents

now..

i know i mentioned the parents thing before

but it's just not enough to have parents...

u need the right type of parents

yes.

i've been pissed and mad and ranted about my parents these past months more than in the whole two years i've been in college

but it's in those rants that i realized that they are my parents

they love me more than i'll ever know til i have kids of my own

and everything they do or say, they do or say out of love

and because they want me to become an even better person than they are

and thru thick or thin, they're always there for me

and i've never lacked anything thanks to them

i'm lucky to have a tv in my room

this might seem very plastic to you

but yes

after having worked more than one job and studied for over a year

now i'm down to one job *another thing i'm lucky to have in this economy*

and let me tell u ppl....

somedays i want to rip my hair out of boredom

but tv saves me from that :)

and since we're on that path

i'm lucky to have a new laptop

cause it also saves me from boredom

let's me have a more personalized pc experience

and helps me not kill my brother while fighting over one computer

*props to dad for getting me an awesome, ice blue dell inspiron 14 =]*

now...

i could go on all day

*or all night seeing as it's 3:35 a.m.*

(and yes... it is late. but tv only saves me from 1 p.m. and forth... so i try to go to bed late *although grams will change that starting monday -.-)

because i am a very blessed person

so props to la mayimba for that ;-)

but

instead

i'll close up with the reason why i hadn't posted in so long

*Jessy.... blame him... i swear i wanted to post earlier xD!*

i'm lucky i'm in love with my best friend

woooow....

now..

set aside the crazy (or so it seemed atm) speculation from his friends and his mother

i would have never seen THIS coming

and yes...

my last post was a bit of a push towards that direction :)

but

yet again

wooow....

i keep pinching myself to see if it's true

i've never felt so safe in a relationship before

and i also keep rechecking myself to see if it's the same person

cuz the saying "you never really know someone..." has never been truer

u'd think after 4 years of being best friends...

4 years of hearing 90% of his mind *or so he says..*

u'd know a person

WRONG!

he's sweeter and more thoughtful and kind and cute and loveable and gallant and funny and EVERYTHING as a boyfriend than as a best friend

*which makes sense if u think about it... cuz ur supposed to be nicer with ur gf than with ur best friend...*

but maaaan... if i'd known all of that was possible in him i wouldn't be writing this post in 2009

but i'm glad i am though :)

cuz i like to think u grow a bit and learn a bit about how to treat others and urself everyday

so... maybe i just wasn't ready...

*i hope i am now.... xD! i really don't wanna screw this up*

back to the matter at hand...

i am a very happy person thanks to u :)

u make me smile and laugh every single day

and u give me reasons to become a better gf, friend and person all the time!

i mean... u set the bar pretty high, mate.

i just hope i give back even half of what u give me =]!

te quiero =]!

now...

3:53 a.m.

today is the xmas dinner of my college buddies

*and the secret santa of my college buddies*

tomorrow is the xmas luncheon of my workplace

*and the final secret santa giveaway of my work buddies*

and it's also the premiere of the princess and the frog :D

(yeah yeah... and avatar also -.-)

friday's ricky's bday and ana's bday and the scholarship awardee's xmas party

saturday's the cata de pastelito tour with the DT and sylvia's costume party *any ideas?*

and LILI gets here :D!

sunday's my 2 month anniversary with G :)

*so far i've got the last licey-escogido game and dinner and no clue gift-wise T.T*

and it's also anaJ's b-day

and monday's the day TITA GETS HERE :D!!!!

and ya... i don't need anything else to make my xmas season better.... :D

*although i could name a few ppl that would make my xmas a zillion times better, too :)

(miss ya TONS!)*

yyyy ya!

ta bueno...

i need to beautify me for tomorrow's dinner!

so... no more losing sleep!

toodles!~

Lightning comes, goes

2009-10-18T18:47:00.000-07:00

Better I check myself
'Cause there's no one else
It's just us hanging out
So why we waiting now?

'Cause we can live like kings
Yeah take a risk or live in doubt
Why we waiting now and now and now and now?

my human development test: old age and grief

2009-10-15T20:39:00.000-07:00

*WARNING...

i had to spill...

it's going to be long

but it's my blog

so deal with it >.>*

i was supposed to have a human development test today

about old age [physical, cognitive and social benchmarks]

death [legal issues, different types]

and grief [types, stages and afflictive therapy]

it was supposed to be last tuesday

and let me tell u something

on tuesday

i woke up

and started studying

cuz i wanted to get over with it

but... when i opened the book

and started reading about physical development

i remembered my grandma had cataratas

*dunno how to say it in english*

and as i kept on reading

i saw a lot of my grandmother in that chapter

and i stopped reading

needless to say

i didn't even get to the death and grief chapter

and i sure as hell didn't take that test

see... grief, in my book, is defined as:

the process of adjusting after a loss of someone close

but

how can i say i lost her

if i see her in every corner

everywhere i turn

there's something there

i can't play cards

without thinking about the countless times i played with her

i can't eat platanos!!!!

cuz that's all she would eat in my house

because... she said she shouldn't eat rice so often

so... there goes rice too

the pizza that she said she couldn't stand

yet never hesitated eating when it was there

the infinite number of soap operas she watched

her bingo

the incessant way she took to knowing everything about everyone

how utterly ANNOYING she was when she wanted something

how all my mom's, aunt's and cousin's secretaries kept a personal relationship with her

because she called them so many times she felt the need to actually

i can't eat apples

cuz every time i went to the supermarket she made me get some for her

and oranges too

coffee is way done for me

cuz i only drank the leftover coffee from her mug

not to mention melon

cuz she downright worshipped that fruit

oh n watermelon as well....

and now i can't look at my guava tree

because every sunday

when she came here to go to church with my mom

*and on her last 5 sundays, with me too*

she made it her thing to spot every edible guava

and make my dad climb up and get it for her

did you know she called my maid on saturdays?

to remind her to have my brother's uniform ready for him on monday

and of course to ask about her life

because there wasn't a single person she met

that she didn't want to know everything about

and it's not that she's nosy

no... she geniunely cared

she was everybody's mom

that's why her nickname was "Mami Antonia"

so imagine the confusion when i called "Mami!" in the middle of my house

and two people turned their heads

'cause she wasn't a normal grandmother

she was my second mother :)

when i was months old

and my mom had to get back to work

i stayed at her house

til i was like 4 or 5 years

i even went to school near her house

so she could pick me up

and take me back to my second house *hers*

she taught me how to walk

talk

eat properly

bathe

and nag =P *but this was way after that xD*

by all means

i'm not taking away props to my parents

they're my parents

but...

since i was 3 months old

til i was 4-5 yrs old

from monday thru friday from 8am to 5pm

*and the ocasional family get together on weekends*

she was my mom

she continued being my mom after that

just from afar

calling incessantly every day

*and to think i sometimes thought

"oh jeez, that's mami AGAIN"

but yes... she loved me so much it hurt sometimes*

i have her face

*u should see this pic of hers of when she was my age... almost identical*

her hair

her ability to nag

and i recently added

her bible and her earrings and a very special ring

to my room's disaster of stuff

she is everywhere

*won't leave me alone, i tell u*

as i said in my high school graduation

*which she was sure not to miss...

[or my birthdays,

or my scholarship ceremony,

or anything i did....]*

she's one of the people i admire the most

widowed at the age of 23

with 4 kids [ages 12, 10, 8 and 6 atm]

she managed to raise those kids

all by herself

and they never skipped a meal

they are now grown professionals that couldn't be better off

but as i said before

she also raised me

and all of my cousins

and she even raised her great-grandchildren

or at least the one's she was alive to see

matron and glue of our family

i don't know what we'll do without her

cuz...

as it reads on her gravestone

*written by yours truly*

she was a "mother, grandmother, greatgrandmother but,

above all, an exceptional person"

the world is truly a sadder place without you

i miss u

those three words have so many applications right now

i miss both my grandmothers

because the other one is too far for me to hug

i miss my mom's spunk

it seems to have died for the moment with my grams

i miss Jose Guillermo

who's also resting in peace

i miss Gelany

in whose birthday i couldn't be to celebrate with her

i miss Jessica

whom i wish i could slap some sense to...

i miss Manuel

with whom i talk to less every day

and i miss two other people

whom i'm trying very hard not to miss

and aaargh!

so much shit going on!

and i'm only one person!

so, slowly

calmly

and taking deep breaths

i'll try to solve them

one at a time

Final hell week playlist

2009-10-13T09:31:00.000-07:00

Yes.

it is finally HERE!

the last hell week of this trimester!! :D

and, or so i've heard from my other psych mates...

this is the hardest trimester of the career!

*and it has been the hardest one so far...

even though i personally think they keep getting harder and harder,

i hope this one is the peak... and then the others get easier

(one can only hope, right?)*

so... if i can pull out of this one...

then i'm ok :)

as some of u know, and some of u don't

some stuff has happened

some good, some bad

but... i just need to get through this week

then i know, somehow, it'll all be ok!!!

*or at least i won't have to worry about finals and projects anymore*

meanwhile, i am in the middle of a very stressful day

and nothing helps me take my mind off stress more than music

so, here are today's tunes peeps!

All the right moves - One Republic

Resistance - Muse

Starstrukk - 3OH!3

Where my mouth is - Taking Back Sunday

Somebody to love - Glee *pa cuando quiera cantar*

The shock of lightning - Oasis

Ashes - Embrace

Break me out - The Rescues

Jars - Chevelle *pa cuando coja pique =P*

Sunshine - The All-American Rejects T.T

We are golden - Mika *instant pick-me-up*

let's see if i make it out alive :D!

because we both deserve a good chap :)

2009-10-01T23:12:00.000-07:00

i ♥ u jezz

Bloc Party - This Modern Love

To be lost in the forest
To be cut adrift
You've been trying to reach me
You bought me a book
To be lost in the forest
To be cut adrift
I've been paid
I've been paid

Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
Just keep telling me facts
And keep making me smile
Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
I get tongue-tied
Baby, you've got to be more discerning
I've never known what's good for me
Baby, you've got to be more demanding
I will be yours

I'll pay for you anytime

You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Well jump on, enjoy, you can gorge away
You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Jump right
Baby, you've got to be more discerning
I've never known what's good for me
Baby, you've got to be more demanding
Jump left

What are you holding out for?
What's always in the way?
Why so damn absent-minded?
Why so scared of romance?

This modern love breaks me
This modern love wastes me

Do you wanna come over and kill some time?
Tell me facts, tell me facts, tell me facts
Tell me facts
Throw your arms around me

i'm going to burst.

2009-09-30T11:12:00.001-07:00

shortest post in the world...

i'm going to go INSANE

i need today to be over soon

and i need everything to solve itself quickly

i need my peaceful state of mind to come back

or i'm going to explode

any ideas?

Relationships, quotes and wonderings of a knowledgable but foolish mind

2009-09-26T11:35:00.000-07:00

Here's one for my ladies....

if and whenever you have the time...

sit down and read...

i know it might seem kinda long

but it's compulsory >.>!!!!!!

i must say that whenever i decide to write out my theories on love and all that jazz

this girl is going to be my editor :D

Relationships, quotes and wonderings of a knowledgable but foolish mind: "

“You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy”

-Erica Jong (American writer and feminist, 1942)

I suppose that this is where my issues begin. I consider myself rather on the smart side. not a genius, but a rather a socially adept dork.
I've been having issues with the male gender recently. Namely, loss of respect, trust, reliance.... in general, a loss of faith in them and what they represent in women's lives.

I suppose it's because I've been dealing with the rather stupid side of the gender. Or is it because I'm dealing with the stupid but nice and cute, and the smart and cute asshole. I don't know. But when it comes to men, I've come to regard them all with lust and disdain.
An old saying goes:

“God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him”

So, IS that my problem? That I bear the burden of intelligence? ad knowledge and wisdom, and standards and expectations? Is it really? It makes a girl wonder. It makes me reconsider and question if I'm not being to harsh, or too uptight, or too selfish. It makes me think that maybe I'm just asking for too much of a guy. But then again, I quote Erica Jong once again:

“Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilty and I'll show you a man.”

Sadly, she has a point. Men are, in general, selfish creatures. I'm not saying that there aren't women that are this way too, but in women, there is a certain desire to nourish and cradle, to be there, to be supportive, and understanding, to be sympathetic that is just plain undeniable and more often than not, it is of a subconscious nature. I'll blame it on biology, evolution and preservation of the species. If men are known to be selfish, rather thoughtless creatures, someone's gotta take care of business with the family and make sure the kids are taken care of.... hence the nourishing, selfless ways, and when the selfless ways are ignored and women become deviant from this norm, we feel guilty. Yes, we feel guilty. I'll openly admit that the one reason I haven't left home and gone to do my own thing is because I would feel insanely guilty about leaving my mom like my dad has and I'd feel guilty for not having her being able to rely on me, just like she has come to be with my brother.

Which leads me into my next point in case. As much as I am independent and self reliant and have a can-do attitude, it can only go so far. Hormones are hormones and I can't fight the enemy betraying me from the inside... I am, a sucker for men. Wait, that didn't come out right. lol. What I mean is, that I am pretty much like any other girl out there, I want a guy I can rely on. Not because I will (because I most likely won't) but because it is comforting to have the option and the knowledge that my back is covered. I read somewhere today:

Its interesting to consider that women are attracted to strong men. Many of these women don't even realize why they are attracted to them. I do. Its because they're looking for the man who is in complete control of his faculties and his life. The man of unrelenting strength of character and mind. Why? Because such a man wouldn't let anything mare his plans for happiness. And guess who would directly benefit from that?

Well damn. That's all I can say to that. It's truly impressive that I hadn't realized that yet, with how true it is and how much I dwell on the subject of relationships. Nonetheless, it is true. I posted it as a facebook status earlier today, and someone commented that:

The statement is false... A relationship has always and will always consist of one stronger partner than another, the human condition unfortunately. In scientific terminology, 2 elements of equal polarity regardless of mass or volume will oppose one another equally, strong men and strong women normally will not permanently attract each other, one has to be stronger thus making one weaker by default.. Look at super stars who marry other super stars, they never last... So, a strong woman is not actually looking for a strong man, just someone stronger than themselves... and vice-versa.

To which I replied:

I do agree with it. I don't think that one necesary must be stronger than the other, I think it's more of consistent with being able COMPLEMENT each other, and work as a team in general. No matter how strong you are, you will always have flaws and weak spots. If you have a person by your side that can complement you and vice versa, then you are more likely to be strong as a unit, not just as individuals. but hey, I'm just sayin'.

As much as I am coming to distrust men and refuse to rely on them, I do still hope to get to someone, someone I can rely one, and believe in, and empower and feel uplifted by... I want to feel someone is part of my team, someone I know can stand by my side and I can consider an equal, a compliment. This is after all, what God intended when he created women.

But the more time passes I lose faith that this is ever gonna happen... but hey what do I know.

I'll end the post with another quote from Erica Jong, one that proves that feminists are not devoid of a vagina and a ♥:

“Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.”

Laters folks.

Jezz

Modesty, Holmes, Men and Settling

2009-09-26T11:24:00.000-07:00

oh dear god..

i must admit it is kind of freaky sometimes

but i know that if i had started writing about this

*which was my intention*

i could have NEVER said it as good as she did :)

take it away Jessy!~

Modesty, Holmes, Men and Settling: "While talking to my somewhat awesome asshole of a boss, we came onto the subject of a 'good guy'.
I mentioned not needing a friday night off as I had requested cuz my date had canceled. (yes, curious ones, this was Jacob wannabe).
He proceded to laugh, and then ask, rather incredulously, "your date dumped you?" I explained, the whole thing (six flags day with his college wasn't gonna be going on this year as he thought)
He then mentioned Jacob's college, and says "I though XXX was for smart people?" I said it was, and explained that Jacob wannabe is indeed, rather smart... and then told him I didn't care too much because he's kind of an asshole.
He replies, "Well, I mean, you can't expect to have it all! If he's smart and good looking, he's gonna be an ass. Its the way things work" My co-worker states, "Yeah, unless you go for the geeks, they're the nice ones, even if they are a little weird." My boss finishes it up by saying "There is no possible combination in which a man has all the above. He's either cute and smart but not good looking, or good looking and nice, but stupid, or he's smart and good looking, but an ass. I am the smart and good looking, and yes, I'm kind of an ass."
To finish off the above conversation, I asked my boss, and my co-worker, that well, because I'm smart, and nice and hard-working and -if I say so myself- pretty darn good looking, do I not have the right to hope, expect and demand the same from a guy? To which I got mock chastised over 'tooting my own horn' and not being modest.
To that, I quote my childhood hero, Sherlock Holmes:

'My dear Watson,' said he, 'I cannot agree with those who rank modesty among the virtues. To the logician all things should be seen exactly as they are, and to underestimate one's self is as much a departure from truth as to exaggerate one's own powers.'

But, my dears, the real reason behind my post, is not whether not I am modest, but rather, if for lack of modesty, I am expecting too much of the opposite sex.

I mean, I stand by what I say... Considering I'm not a whiny bitch, I'm fun, I'm nice, I'm responsible, I'm smart and I'm really damn self reliant and independent, and like I said before, I'm pretty good looking. Not a supermodel, but good looking none the less.

So IS it too much to expect from a guy to be up to par? I mean, I would like to be with someone I can call and consider an equal. I do like the thought of seeing my significant other as a teammate in life, someone I can count on and vice versa. If I have so much to offer, why should I have to settle for someone who won't put 50 to my 50?

*sigh*

Another day in which my faith in men drowns slowly.

paranoid =/

2009-09-24T14:25:00.000-07:00

i make the most of all this stress

i try to live without regrets

but i'm about to break a sweat

i'm freaking out!

Quote

2009-09-14T16:24:00.000-07:00

Quote: "

'I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience ...-- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death.' - Robert Fulghum.

how to decided who to marry XD!!! PLOP!

2009-09-07T06:19:00.000-07:00

omaigaaaaa! xD

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (Written by kids):
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
- Alan, age 10

No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
- Kristen, age 10

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then..
- Camille, age 10

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
- Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids.
- Lori, age 8

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
- Martin, age 10

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
- Craig, age 9

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich.
- Pam, age 7

The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
- Curt, age 7

The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. My dad told me this as well and I still believe him :)
- Howard, age 8

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
- Anita, age 9

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
- Kelvin, age 8

And the #1 Favorite is...
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck hit her.
- Ricky, age 10

over my head.

2009-09-04T10:57:00.000-07:00

tan bella! =D
i miss it too...
and i'm also in over my head!
*til september 15th at least =/*

over my head.: "Hellou there!~

I have to say i had a GREAT summer, i spend time with all of my friends, i met a lot of people, really nice people i have to say, and i'm gonna miss all of that. big time.
is actually a shame it's over and we all have to go back to the reality now. but hey, we had tons of fun. (:

[...]

--- * ---
And suddenly I become a part of your past
I'm becoming the part that don't last
I'm losing you and its effortless
Without a sound we lose sight of the ground
In the throw around
Never thought that you wanted to bring it down
I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves

till next time.
Dals,
<3

"

ishh....

2009-09-03T09:25:00.000-07:00

so yes
i am alive :D
it's amazing
but i am

yesterday was THE day
if i thought doomsday was last week
then i was certainly wrong

you must notice there's tons going on
seeing as i am posting almost everyday
because i tend to post when in trouble or doubt

but moving on to the point
let's start from beginning til end

i went to bed at 5 o'clock in the morning
talking on the phone
having one of the most
frustrating
interesting
awesome
mind-opening
stupid
mature conversations
i've ever had
EVER

you might ask how that all comes together
in the same conversation
but when you talk for 7 hours
a lot can happen
trust me

that aside
while i was talking on the phone
i was having a eye-popping conversation online
and i must say i am sorta mad
if you hadn't noticed
because you are being kind of hypocritical
even though you profess to hate those who are
because..
if you can do it
[live, explore, share]
then why can't i?
i'm sad to notice
but... in this case... i have to tell u i told u so
i know how it feels
*like crap*
but deal with it

moving on
i woke up at 7
cause i had a psychiatric rotation in the ward
*si señores... el 28*
i was quite excited to go
i had been told a million things about it
yet i couldn't've expected what i saw

the place is in ruins
yet they continue receiving people
patients wandering around in empty lifeless corridors and "yards"
patients in stinky rooms with no light
patients in awful beds, tied up with pieces of cloth
no real coordination
no activities to keep them entertained
*and i know what you're thinking...
yet, imagine if they stuck you in there for a week...
even you'd end up insane with nothing to do*
it was downright depressing
*valga la redundancia*

and the so-called psychs-to-be that conducted the case study
are idiots
and take nothing into account
they should take a couple of psychology classes
give them something to think about
*jerks*

so i get out of there
totally slumped
dying of hunger and TIRED of walking
sweating
around 12

i get to intec
eat
and proceed to shut myself in the test lab in the psych area
and stay there doing homework
had an essay to turn it at 4...
i finished my essay and sent it with Teteh to the class

by then
i was sick of being in intec
dying to get home and take a nice bath
and just curl up in my bed and sleep til next week
but no

5:30
i had missed the 4 o'clock class
because i was doing my 6 o'clock expo in the lab
i got out
breathed some fresh air
and got in my classroom
only to see that the only 3 people
in the entire section
that hadn't had the chance to go home and bathe and change
were Teteh, Juansito and I...
though i guess it's not that bad
since by staying i got to see him and chat for a while :)

now here's the best part...
guess my luck
there was no air conditioning in intec >.>
so i had to do my exposition
about anorexia, bulimia and sleep disorders
in a very hot room

thankfully we could finish fast
without the teacher's insinious comments and interventions
and thankfully got out of the classroom and into my car by 7:15 pm

i rode my car thru the city to G's house
since i hadn't sat down and talked to him in a while
*not my fault... incredibly*
keep guessing my luck
city-wide blackout
no hot, soothing water when i get home >.<
but alas

i chatted as long as my parents permitted
seeing as they wanted to sit down and have dinner together
so i rushed back home
to a nice dinner with the fam
*mangu c/ queso blanco y/o camarones a la vinagretta*
yummm!!!
bathed...
got into my bed
*aaaaahhhhhhh... =D*
and called him
had a really nice, non-frustrating talk
didn't want to hang up
yet between my parents' little shouts insisting that i get to bed
and his great persuasion skills
i got to sleep by 10 o'clock

today's forecast isn't that grey
no homework
no classes til 6
so tons of sleep =]
yet i don't think i'll get to see him today =/

thinking, wishing and waiting til the next one
toodles!~

aaaaaaahhhh =]

2009-08-31T19:48:00.000-07:00

ok so..

you know how sometimes you have this thing...

that's stressing you out..

and you've been holding yourself back for quite a while..

but you hadn't noticed?

and then when you do figure it out...

and solve it

you feel this HUGE weight off your shoulders?

that's how i feel :)

so today, my peeps

i quit my job

yep

i did it

i quit.

it was a whole production

letting everyone know at the time they needed to know

i reaffirmed my workmates that i would do it

mulled things over with the pre-school shrink

spoke to my supervisor

*so understanding =] she's a great gal*

spoke to the HR recruiter

*huge task she has ahead of her*

spoke to my very sad coordinator..

*i'll miss her*

and finally, the HR manager...

*everyone else had softened the blow*

left with a heavy heart and a light head

my last day as teacher Alannah will be sept. 15

no more birthday parties...

no more 'teacher did you know i ate at mcdonald's last night?'

no more spontaneous 'teacher i love you's

no more smiling parents with their trusting smiles

no more 'teacher'

i couldn't finish the essay

so i decided to be honest and tell the teacher i wouldn't do it for today

i wouldn't have done it justice to hand in a mediocre essay

i have to hand it in by wednesday

i talked to him

yes

much to everyone's dismay

i did

see...

i'm a very sociable person...

i'm not the type to have frenemies...

maybe i do... but i don't know they are..

cuz if i did...

i would do anything in my power to change their status

i couldn't do the whole charade thing again

so yeah..

he's been acting like a jerk

so yeah..

we fought

so yeah..

i called him and we worked things out

he's one of my best friends

and i was missing that tiny part of me

and it had me going crazy

sorry

deal with it

>.>

i don't mean to be rude

but i'm just sick of all the comments...

sick of all the questions...

so i'll just do what my heart tells me to do

and right now

it's telling me that even though he did behave like a total ass

*i'm sorry.. i just had to say it*

i'm a hopeless optimistic

and he's my friend

apart from that...

not much more to report

i'm off to bed

there are still some kinks to be worked out

between the whole me quitting, me being his friend things

but i am confident i'll be able to work it out on the way

there's also the guys thing...

i've had some proposals

some more open than others

i dunno

guys will be guys

and they'll keep me perplexed in the meantime

nothing too serious for now for me

yeah... i'm just chilling

exploring

interacting =P

gotta go to bed mates

sorry if i disappointed anyone

it's not my intention

*i love u ju*

Once again talking to Jacob wannabe

2009-08-31T09:21:00.000-07:00

Yeah Jess... well.. guess what...
a donkey can't talk about ears, right?
*if u know what i'm saying =/*
i think i know what you're talking about now
[had to learn the hard way]

Once again talking to Jacob wannabe: "SOOOOOO!!!
Where do I begin with this one?

Much to my dear friend Ally's chagrin, I have continued to talk to Jacob Wannabe.
For those of you who wonder, I did NOT see him at the fam affair.
It's actually a pretty interesting story...
See, he decided to go to Rome, GA to visit PB at her college campus and stay for the weekend.
I got word of this, and decided to go to the family affair, fully knowing he WOULD NOT be there :)
(for the curious ones, I went to Habitat, I went to the pool for a couple hours, and I then went to the fam affair. No, I couldn't settle for just one of the above, I'm an over-achiever lol)
It was fun, hug out with some friends, ate plenty of Dominican food, and desserts, took a pic with an enormous amount of people quite possible twice my age (lol) and showed 'the parents' a youtube clip dubbed 'Dominican Family Guy' which ensued so much laughter that my mom fell off a chair and couldn't talk for a minute because of it. (yeah, my mom would go and take the cake! lol)
Anyhow, Jacob wannabe was unaware that I knew he would be in Rome. So sunday night, I'm at work, as usual, and we start to chat on FB.
He asks if I went to the fam affair, and how it went. I told him it was pretty cool, and asked him what he did.
He decided to lie and said he was with one of his friends (who in fact, was at the fam affair) and that he chilled on campus. I decided to end the conversation by saying, 'Well, I hope you had fun in Rome with PB' and logged off the chat.
This caused him to text me apologizing, and I just called him a douche and told him to STFU, to which he actually listened to.
Two weeks passed, he apologizing by text messages every other day.... and I mean literally, every other day at 9:00 am, waking me up in a friggin panic on my days off from school when I get to sleep in, and sorta kinda begged to see me. lol. I'll admit I enjoyed the attention.
Anyhow, Friday night I found myself bored, and hungry and not in the mood to do much anyway, so when he texted around 10 asking to pick me up from work and offering to buy me midnight Taco Bell (a continuous habit I continue to indulge in, and would not trade for the world), I said heck why not; of course, after debating if I should and discussing possible scenarios that might ensue with CoccoSooz, and having her tell me I need to lay down the law (I know, wtf?!)
Since my office has moved it's location, he got lost in the way, and I had to walk from the main exit to the back one in order for him to find me. I then proceeded to guilt trip him for it too. lol.
Anyhow, we ended up going through the drive thru, and then parking in front of the pool, and eating at the gazebo in front. He actually watched the youtube video that made my mom fall off her chair and laughed so much he choked on his food (lol) and we talked plenty. He remind me that the offer for the Salsa class is still on, and so is the Sky-diving as well. I agreed to doing both, and reminded him that we have yet to go to six flags and get on the rides, so we agreed to go sometime next month and get our money's worth for the season passes we bought two months ago.
He (once again) apologized about the whole lot of drama and BS he seems to drag along with him, and I just told him IDC WTF he decides to do his his gf, xgf, whatever she might be.
He did hug me, but no attempts to cross the line. Yes, the invisible wall between us still exists.
Anyhow, after about an hour of talking, I called it a night and decided to go home. The end.

All in all, even though the guy is a douche and is most certainly not made for any kind of relationship whatsoever, as a friend, he's pretty good. Just like Jacob.

Catch y'all laters!

soundtrack of my weekend ♪

2009-08-29T07:38:00.001-07:00

Muse - Falling away with you

Jim Sturgess - Across the universe

Paramore - Ignorance

Mika - My interpretation

Mika - We are golden

John Mayer - Bigger than my body

Yellowcard - The takedown

The All-American Rejects - Gives you hell

hehe...

that last one is a guilty pleasure of mine

tee-hee xD

what i learned in class today

2009-08-27T19:40:00.001-07:00

so... this is what i learned in class today...

and as a good student..

i am applying what i learned to every day things

as a matter of reviewing, you could say...

we started the exposition on young adulthood

and we were talking about moral development [of the young adult]

my great friend Kohlberg

creator of the 6 [or now 7] stages of moral development

tells us that, for a young adult

*or in his case a man cause all his investigations were with male subjects*

to really finish his moral development he must go through some stuff...

if not... it is very unlikely that a person might willingly go through the necessary changes

to his morale that might trigger a personality change

in his own words:

Dos experiencias que estimulan el desarrollo moral en los adultos jovenes son:

encontrar valores en conflicto fuera del hogar

[lease, encontrar a un grupo grande de personas que esten en desacuerdo con tus principios]

y ser responsable del bienestar de otros [ya sea por paternidad o por una crisis familiar].

this is meant for someone

who hasn't gone through any of those experiences

but should...

so anywho

i also learned from Gilligan

[yes... as in Gilligan's island xD]

who just so happens to be Kohlberg's nemesis

*because she worked with female subjects*

describes moral development in stages with transitions...

i liked this particular transition with its following stage:

Transition between stage 2 and 3: analisis del desequilibrio entre autosacrificio y cuidado, reconsideracion de la relación entre el yo y los otros.

3 – inclusion del yo y de los otros en la responsabilidad del cuidado. necesidad de equilibrio entre el poder y el cuidado de si misma, por una parte, y el cuidado de los demas por la otra. [moralidad de la no violencia] .

this reminds me a lot of what i've been thinking about for a couple of days
should i or shouldn't i quit my job?

evidently so... or so everyone points out to me...
it would do me a great deal of good to quit
but... evidently so....
it wouldn't do any of my coworkers ANY good
not my supervisor, not the HR manager, not my coordinator, not my partner....
i would miss seeing the kids each day...
being a part of their lives...
i would miss joking around with Javier every morning
seeing Julie for at least 20 minutes between my recess and hers
helping out Ivanova as much as i can =/
*she has too much on her plate, i say*
i would miss it all =/

so... i'm at this impassé of sorts
*Gilligan would call it transition #2*
and for the moment...
i would like it to stay that way...
give all my different bosses a happy weekend
talk it over with the rents..
and maybe...
just maybe...
give the Q-bomb
*no, not the Q-tip*
on monday =/

apart from that
i must report a change in the roster of faces
there is a new face that has requested permission to be in the roster
and i couldn't say no :)
i have to say it's been a while since i've been so flattered
so, hey? why the heck not?!

it's still my life.... right?

doomsday! :O

2009-08-26T19:24:00.000-07:00

so...

this is a quickie

as i promised myself that i would go to bed early today

seeing as i have had a total of 16 hours of sleep in the past 3 days...

and my days have not been spent sitting down in the classroom >.<

yesterday was the day i became a young adult :)

not an easy task my friends

a lot of thinking

not a lot of discussing

and a lot of sacrifices =/

so i wake up around 6:30 after 4 hours of sleep...

and decide i was quitting that day

i was gonna talk to my supervisor and the HR manager

and i was gonna quit

because i was tired of not sleeping, never eating in my house

never having time to study or see my mom, etc...

plus... this year... the school was being even more demanding

and the schedules and the erratic changes were driving me insane

and in a nutshell i pictured what it would be like

waking up at 10 am

studying and doing my assignments

going to the gym

coming back to eat

get a good parking space in intec

grab a couple more classes in the dominico

see my mom... visit my grams....

the life :)

less money?

yes... but i would survive...

so i was totally determined...

i even talked to my workmate...

and then... the bell ringed 7:45 am..

and in walked Jorge Arias... Josue... Xaona :)

oh God...

so i started thinking...

and then in came Lucas... :D

and then Claudia, Alexander, Michelle...

how could i not see them everyday?

how could i leave them just as they're starting the year?

in the hands of a new teacher... who knows nothing of the school's inner workings...

and that's not even touching the tip of the mess they have this year...

or how could i put poor Claudia in the search of yet ANOTHER english teacher...

or Ivanova... ahy Ivanova... going insane with a semi-new staff...

or Gina.... don't even get me started...

plus..

i thought of not being able to help around in my house

even in the least bit...

i mean.. i know my parents can handle the bills

but

it feels nice :) even if it is a tiny teeny bit

or being able to "support" myself

so...

well..

decided that for the time being i would stick around

and not take any rash decisions...

then fine... let's move on

*8:05 am... damn.... long ass day... *

10:45 am... recess... THANK GOD....

the ups and downs *literal ones... like on the stairs*

the class changes..

the backpack messes in the hallways

kids without classrooms

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!

3 o'clock

out of the school at last...

feet hurt cuz i've been in heels the whole day

*shit i need my car... my car has my shoes...*

i haven't finished my expo on the deaf in education....

i haven't even started studying for my development test

more importantly yet... i haven't eaten

i go eat... get on it

6 o'clock...

got the expo down...

still haven't studied...

8 o'clock...

i barely finished the expo and i need to get to my next class

Vero gives the word

she just got out from a full out 5 question test with Marisol

shit..

she can't be that hard on us...

this is our last subject with her [the 5th one]

and she has never given us that type of tests

maybe it's because Vero's class only has 8 students...

ok... chill.... it's a T or F, multiple selection and complete test...

maybe 1 or 2 questions...

WRONG....

5 questions

it might sound like just a bit right...

GUESS AGAIN

those 5 questions contained the whole chapter

in essence

i sat there for two hours downloading every single piece of information i had in my brain

about the teen years... physical, cognitive and social development...

as if it weren't enough already

it's 10 o'clock and i haven't had dinner

or read what i have to know for tomorrow's class

and i haven't seen my parents yet

cuz i left my house at 6:55 am

and i haven't gotten home yet...

i want to sleep

i'm tired...

CRAP!

oh yeah...

i need to pay my car's repair bills

and i need to call my grams...

i haven't talked to her since i came back...

oh right...

i'm not going to Chile in march

i'm not getting out of cycle

i'm not leaving my group

and i'm not gonna put that economic pressure on my parents

i can wait to experience an out-of-country education when i get my master's scholarship

so... anywho... well

i haven't even began to say anything about my recent friend changes

and i've surpassed my time in the computer

so.. i'm not gonna for the moment

i'll sum it up to a couple of letdowns... in general

and a couple of new discoveries... of sorts

tons of love

gotta sleep

got it!~

2009-08-25T21:24:00.000-07:00

My interpretation -Mika

You talk about life, you talk about death,
And everything in between,
Like it's nothing, and the words are easy.
You talk about me, and you talk about you,
And everything I do,
Like it's something, that needs repeating.
I don't need an alibi or for you to realize,
The things we left unsaid,
Are only taking space up in our head.
Make it my fault, win the game
Point the finger, place the blame
It does me up and down,
It doesn't matter now.

[chorus:]
'Cause I don't care if I ever talk to you again.
This is not about emotion,
I don't need a reason not to care what you say,
Or what happened in the end.
This is my interpretation,
And it don't, don't make sense.

The first two weeks turn into ten,
I hold my breath and wonder when it'll happen,
Does it really matter?
If half of what you said is true,
And half of what I didn't do could be different,
Would it make it better?
If we forget the things we know.
Would we have somewhere to go?
The only way is down, I can see that now.

It's really not such a sacrifice

Gratitude & Love rarely go hand in hand

2009-08-24T17:50:00.000-07:00

wiser words were never spoken...

Gratitude & Love rarely go hand in hand: "There was
a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She
hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always
there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see
the world, I will marry you.'

One day,
someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages
came off, she was able to see everything, including her
boyfriend.

He asked
her,'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The
girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The
sight of his closed eyelids shocked her.. She hadn't expected
that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life
led her to refuse to marry him.

Her
boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her
saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before
they were yours, they were mine.'

This is
how the human brain often works when our status changes.
Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who
was always by their side in the most painful situations.

Life Is a
Gift

Today
before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't
speak.

Before
you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone
who has nothing to eat.

Before
you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone
who's crying out to GOD for a companion.

Today
before you complain about life - Think of someone who went
too early to heaven.

Before
whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who
walks the same distance with their feet.

And when
you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the
unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your
job.

And when
depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on
your face and think: you're alive and still
around.

==========================

Olvidate

2009-08-23T20:14:00.000-07:00

Ufff!!!

Teteh... te pasaste ahi!~

Couldn't have said it any better myself!!!

*muahk!*

Olvidate: "

Me siento en la necesidad de desnudarme

De sonreírte

De mirarte y mirarme

Y ser

Ser…beber de la copa sobre la mesa

De ver la luna y las estrellas

¿En que estábamos?

Sentirte a ti pero más a tu boca

Ser

Ser de esas que no se equivocan a la hora de hablar

Pero soy muy directa, poco estética, sincera…

Soy esto…una amiga mas…

Te miro y siento ganas de besarte…de nuevo

“Lying's the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off ... but it's better if you do”

¿Que decías?

No, no quiero ser tu novia

No, no estoy enamorada de ti

No, simplemente no quiero

Solo me gustas…mucho

Solo eso, notas la diferencia?

El amor es así, sabias?

Doloroso

Muchas veces no nos enamoramos de la persona que se enamoro de nosotras o nosotros

Muchas veces no estamos dispuestas o dispuestos a enamorarnos

Pero lo hacemos…inexplicablemente

Sientes la brisa?

Yo si

Dentro de mi es como una gran fiesta

Infinitos tal vez…si…no se…no

Siento

Y siento

Y valga la redundancia…siento otra vez!

Shh…solo calla

No son necesarias esas líneas ya escuchadas

No me tienes que halagar

Mi belleza es completamente subjetiva

Ok…por qué me gustas?

Eres tan predecible que hasta se que dirás

Qué no eres predecible?

Eso es justamente lo que pensé que dirías

Solo bésame y olvídate de mi mañana!

Tribus urbanas! ufff!!!

2009-08-11T10:49:00.000-07:00

Let me tell you guys something...

i've been following this dude for quite a while now

he's a teen whose blog is one of Listin Diario's online blogs

this one, obviously, directed to teens

and it talks about daily life and stuff =P

now

i must admit i love how he talks

and how some of his stuff is very down to earth

at the beginning i thought he must be some kind of alien

considering his grammar is almost flawless

which is something hard to find in a now 15 year old..

*he was 13 when i started reading his blog*

anywho

i read this little post and laughed so hard

somethings are true

most of them

but then again

considering what it says at the end

that each of us has a bit of everything

then i guess it's ok =]

i, myself, do not know which i am!

but here's the link

Tribus Urbanas by Chris Vargas

july 30th

2009-08-02T17:59:00.001-07:00

so…
let me just write out a bit of an index to this post…
so I can remember all that I’m thinking about right now..
because these are the single most substantial thoughts I’ve had so far in these vacations…

1- aimless walking thru mulberry street
2- magic of it [memories of ‘06]
3- changes [naiveté, moment of clarity, etc.]
4- back to mulberry [children, cars, recycling, walking, etc.]

5- arrival at point B [corner kids]

6- McDonald’s…..

7- inside the house… grams…

8- back to class…

9- back to work

10- back to life.

anywho…

let’s get going

shall we?

as I walk aimlessly thru the streets of reading

*well, as aimless as you can when going from point A to point B*

with my iPod plugged in

my camera in my right pocket

and the cell in my left pocket

it was 10:20 when I left 10^th street

I started out towards my favorite street in the world

mulberry street =]

the very name of the street brings back tons of happy memories

takes me back to my last innocent summer

which would be the summer between my junior and senior year in high school

summer of 2006

my little brother, my cousin and myself were sent from DR to:

- visit my grams

- accompany my cousin on her maiden voyage to what is now her country

- spend my last school summer and enjoy a nice, month-long trip to the states

now

I must say

when I stepped into the airport on july 4^th

I wanted nothing more but to leave and have a great summer

but when I stepped in NY ground

and watched the fireworks from downtown manhattan

I wanted nothing more but to be back in my house

I had a quite murderous flashback

to when I found out I wasn’t going to spend the summer home

my mom was singing this freaking song

‘un verano en nueva york’

and all I was thinking about was

that I would be missing a summer of French classes with my friends

that when I got back

they would be almost finishing their stint in l’alliance

while I would have to endure 6 more months by myself

something I hadn’t done to the date

seeing as I had gone a whole 9 courses with my best friend Rose

but alas

came the day

I was in manhattan

with no return flight booked yet

because my parents had the suspicion I would want to spend more time

ha ha ha

anyways.. that was the last day I spent in NY

the next day we were packing up the house

and moving my grams and her sister to Reading, PA

aka… small town, USA

*note… Reading isn’t pronounced like the verb ‘to read’…

it’s pronounced red-ing …….

I KNOW….

it took some getting used to*

upon arrival

it seemed to be a very quaint town

aka… very boring with no life in it

but with time

it grew on me

or rather the environment grew on me

bunch of family get togethers

having grams around every day

joking around with the cousins

and staying up late at night

[while grams was at work]

just sitting around in my aunt’s porch

talking catwings…

*get it? cats don’t have wings…*

and in those late-nights

we also wandered in our PJ’s

around Reading’s streets

so, I discovered Mulberry =]

rows upon rows upon rows of cars

on each side of the street

and accompanying those cars were

rows upon rows upon rows of houses

one next to the other…

we used to wander down mulberry

at 1 o’clock in the morning

down the middle of the street

like we owned the place

and if you stood at one special point

and looked down the street

it looked as if the street would never end

and the cars and houses blurred with each other

as I walked down mulberry street on that july night

three years after we first met

all those naïve thoughts came into mind

the feeling of having no worries whatsoever

school wouldn’t start for a whole month

no job to worry about for another 6 months

had a boyfriend but

innocently so

didn’t worry about that either

I was at the top of my game

now

when I walk down

I can’t say I’ve banished all innocent thoughts

when I see the kids running down their porches

running away from tired parents

which at 10:30 is a clear sign of summer vacations

neighbors walking down and saying hi

a group of kids in front of a car admiring it

an old man putting his garbage and recycling bin out

makes me think of the all-american dream

but I also see

empty garages

broken down homes

empty homes

empty storefronts

tons of for-sale signs

candle-lit living rooms

and this change not only allowed me to see different things in that street

I now know the love-hate relationships that surround me

find out things I wish I hadn’t found out in the first place

notice odd looks

worry about stuff back home

worry about my grades

worry about my jobs

worry about my friends and close friends

and yeah… ‘bout that too

even though it’s not there anymore

back to my night walk

I stop at regular intervals and try to take pictures

to make a video

but considering the hour

and the light conditions

I had to put my camera on top of a car

to make it steady enough

to get a night portrait

I only got one decent picture

considering a lot of people were outside

and would look suspiciously at a girl with a camera on top of a car

and considering there weren’t that many cars anymore

but

thanks to a nice spot

and to my camera’s ‘perfect touch technology’

I got this AWESOME picture

now I get that you’re trying to see the charm

but…

as they say

beauty is in the eye of the beholder

and also

that shot doesn’t get the infinite rows of cars and houses angle…

so I get ya…

anywho

I arrived at point B [gram’s house]

around 10:40 I began to see signs of spring street

corners filled with bunches of guys just lying around

big headlights

latin music

and around that same time

my stomach rumbled at the sight of the house

since I was kind of lazy and tired

*it was a 7 block walk*

I walked a bit further and arrived at McDonald’s parking lot

as I walked to the door

two girls de-mounted from a car

and attempted to drunkenly open the door

with no success

it was CLOSED

had to be small town…

10:45 and the McDonald’s was closed….

the drive thru was open

but there was a 10 car line

and I wasn’t going to wait around for them to keep on piling up

or cut in line to walk thru a drive thru

I tried with futility to get a hold of my cousin

and when he did call back I could hear the booze in the background

I walked back home…

passed again by the guy filled corners

to hear the same jeering pick up lines from afar

tripped on the way to the porch

walked up with the bit of dignity I had left

and got inside as fast as I could

with no desire to cook

I popped a pop tart in the toaster

served myself a glass of chocolate milk

and after that ate a glass filled with oreo ice cream

grams house was cozy enough….

quaint…

if u know what I’m saying

but I sometimes worried about her

about what was of her when there wasn’t someone visiting

all alone in this big house

family members far enough away

*thankfully enough……*

having to come back from work at midnight…

sometimes even later…

and I couldn’t help but feel a bit sad =/

I didn’t want to say that I pitied her

but…

I did feel the need to tell her to move in with me

and to live happily ever after in DR

which reminded me of home

and what was happening right now

that day it was my mom’s birthday

and I wasn’t there with her

I had talked to her at midnight

but I don’t think she remembered

seeing as she was between sleeps

and then once at noon

she was probably at home with all our family and her friends

eating some delicious cake

then I thought of Monday

back to class

to face the same teachers I faced last cycle

those same teachers that gave me a hard time

kept me from sleep

*though I must say I can’t complain…

seeing what my lack of sleep in the last week of class gave me in return*

and still gave me a below-my-standards grade…

and how I would inevitably get to class late on Monday

seeing as my flight lands at 2:30 and my first class is at 4

and I will have been up since 3 o’clock in the morning

and flying since 7 am.

yet my teacher would scowl when I interrupted her class with my presence

but my friends will hopefully cheer up when they see me

then I thought of Tuesday

back to work…

when just this afternoon I was talking to a friend of mine

who had quit

and moved on to a better life

and told me of other friends

who hadn’t been given the chance to quit

and had been fired instead

a few moments of shock as I read the names

because we were talking about 6 year old employees

great kick-ass teachers

super-heroes… as their kids would say

who I would no longer see on Tuesday

but then I thought of the friends that hadn’t been fired

MY super teacher with whom I hoped to be teamed up again

and then

I thought about my friends

their troubles

our adventures

our get-togethers

how I missed them

my family

the lost father’s day and mom’s birthday

how I missed them

*them

and how I didn’t know what to do

or think

or say

or… even worse… ACT from Monday on…

and how…

even though I soo didn’t want to…

I missed them

and as I thought of that

a smile crept in my face

and a taste of home sneaked up my lips

and I couldn’t help but think

‘God I can’t wait for Monday’ =]

as I finish this…

my longest post so far

I can’t help but smile as I see the 7 perfect pages

that swam out of my brain thru my fingers

and now are plastered online

for those of you with enough boredom to read

cheers to you

cheers to me

cheers to life.

*corny…. I know…. SO?!* =]

yadda yadda yadda

2009-07-17T15:30:00.000-07:00

as i write...
i am sitting down in a very comfy chair
in the concourse D Admiral's Club of Miami airport
sipping some hot chocolate
eating some cookies
and with absolutely NOTHING to do
=D
*yes... that's good people*

i can't wait for my weekend in ATL
Jessica and I will be wrecking through downtown Atlanta in no time =]
CNN tour, Coca-Cola museum, Hard Rock [need the cup! xD]
Braves vs. Mets aaand [the pearl] the All-American Rejects
*yes... she is too good for me...*

after that...
it's off to the east coast
to my familiar lands
in every sense of the word
to enjoy the company of my grams and uncle and cousins
and shop 'til i drop and my card is maxed out
and walk 'til my knees hurt
visit my fave NYC spots:
Strand
Ben n Jerry's in Rockerfeller Center
Central Park
maybe go to Philly
and see the famous Love Park and Liberty Bell

but
what's most important here is that
i'm ON VACATIONS!
on ME time...
no guyz, no obligations, no nothing [double negative intended =P]
til further notice ;-)

gonna go walk a bit...
stomach is churning for something tasty =]
latah!

que trozo de cancion!!!

2009-07-13T00:47:00.000-07:00

Stratovarius - Eagleheart

*click for the vid*

All through the night he is lying awake
Wond'ring how much more can he take
Watching the walls where shadows dance
Drifting away into a trance.

And his eyes are blazing with fire

Dreams burnt to ashes so many times
Highest of mountains, still he climbs
Ready to fly cause he just can't stay
Flame burning brighter with every day

And his eyes are blazing with fire
Longinng for the deepest desire

Heart of an eagle
He flies through the rainbow
Into a new world and finds the sun
Spreading his wings above all the sorrows
The glory of Eagleheart

Fever is burning in his veins
Determined with courage breaking the chains
Back against the wall under blood red skies
Prepared to fight until he dies

________________________________________

i must admit i hadn't had a night like this in a long time

all the pressure in the world

almost falling asleep

feeling like _________

and with the simplest of things

you made me smile =)

you sent me a link

you made me take a trip back in time

to my melodic-rock-ish days

and just listen...

and sit still for a while

and forget about EVERYTHING!

anxious as hell

just looking for a song that might give you the nostalgic feeling i have

or simply listening to the playlist your making up as you go...

you might've not noticed

as i was sitting in my own far away room

but you made my day

creating a little music bubble for me to sit in for a while

and be me without fear of saying something wrong

or giving you a song that's not-in-the-mood

or saying some really corny comment on the song of the minute

thank you =]

________________________

[4:31 a.m.]

and i can't seem to want to go to sleep

yet i know i should

and you deliver this last blow

and this type of things should be against the law!

Héroes del Silencio - La Chispa Adecuada

Las palabras fueron avispas
y las calles como dunas
cuando aun te espero llegar
(de un momento a otro)

En un ataúd guardo tu tacto y una corona
con tu pelo enmarañado
queriendo encontrar un arcoiris infinito

Mis manos que aún son de hueso
y tu vientre sabe a pan
la catedral que es tu cuerpo
lo será del enemigo

Eras verano y mil tormentas
y yo el león que sonríe a las paredes
que he vuelto a pintar del mismo color

No sé distinguir entre besos y raíces
no sé distinguir lo complicado de lo simple

Y ahora estás en mi lista
de promesas a olvidar
todo arde si le aplicas la chispa adecuada

Escribe con carbón en mi pensamiento
que cruzamos océanos de tiempo
dibujando los garabatos de mis fantasías
poco es tanto cuando poco necesitas

El fuego que era a veces propio
la ceniza siempre ajena
blanca esperma resbalando por la espina dorsal

Ya somos más viejos y sinceros y que más da
si miramos la laguna como llaman ala eternidad
de la ausencia

No sé distinguir entre besos y raíces
no sé distinguir lo complicado de lo simple

Y ahora estás en mi lista
de promesas a olvidar
todo arde si le aplicas la chispa adecuada

[5:23 am]

men...

let me go, boys, let me go....

push my boat from the highest cliff to the seas below...

beds are waiting, boys, my bed is waiting....

swoop down from the sky and catch me like a bird of prey....

(8) now my feet won't touch the ground

now my head won't stop

you wait a lifetime to be found

now i need to go to bed.......

g'night!~

take over, the break's over!

2009-07-07T14:00:00.000-07:00

ya-ha!

so..

since i'm no longer in a super fun hotel

and i'm back to reality

i've decided to take over and change some things

maybe from an outsider's point of view

these changes might seem a bit superficial

'oh she cut her hair'

'oh, she changed her blog's format'

but for me

small things like that mean a lot

*well, the hair anyone could've seen it coming...

i love my hair short =]*

and i'm trying day by day

to work on some stuff i've left aside

focus on me

i've taken this weekend of semi-isolation to think

and thanks to the hotel's lack of activities for ppl my age

they helped tons xD

i know i'm not perfect

i know i should take it easier

i know i shouldn't care as much about what other ppl think

i know i should think before i talk

i know i should think of me before i think of everybody else

i know i should listen more than i talk

i know i should try to be more down to earth sometimes....

i know i should've been more understanding

more attune to his feelings, his needs, his thoughts, him.....

did i miss anything?

but since the latter is the only thing in past tense

and all things have been said and done after that

i can't seem to find a better way to fix it

than to say

i'm sorry

and... if there is a next time....

i promise to try harder =/

*on a in-side note:

if you felt weird today

like we shouldn't have been that way

say something =/

TALK to me!

i need the feedback*

in the meantime

i'll try to work on things

i'll try to take these next weeks one step at a time

and think some stuff through

why the post?

well... i've been approached too much today

by my super friends =]

and i don't wish to blow u off...

but it's just that i need some me time

to think

so don't worry... be huggies xD

tons of love

'til the next one

more songs

2009-07-05T12:26:00.000-07:00

teehee

this is just a teaser

for myself at least

my playlist seems to be coming to its end

seeing as i heard this song for the first time today

day 3/4 of my weekend

sadly yet fortunately at the same time

this would be the perfect song for tomorrow xD

seeing as i'm not back in town yet

but... who cares?

this is still MY blog

*right?*

Yellowcard - Shadows and Regrets

*yes... because Yellowcard never fails to give me a great song*

I'm back, back in town
and everything has changed
I feel, feel let down
The faces stay the same
I see, see shadows
Of who we used to be
And I drive, drive these roads
Through this memory

And we were only kids
And we were best of friends
And we hoped for the best
And let go from the rest

I heard, heard myself
Say things I take back
If I could, could retell
And make these stories last
I see, see shadows
Of who you'll always be
I drive, drive these roads
Made of memories

And we were only kids
And we were best of friends
And we hoped for the best
And let go from the rest
Shadows and regrets
Let go from the rest

Everything has changed
Faces stayed the same
Everything has changed
Faces stayed the same

And we were only kids
We were best of friends
When time couldn't end
The world in my hands
And we were only kids
And we were best of friends
And we hoped for the best
And let go from the rest
And shadows and regrets
We let go of the rest
Shadows and Regrets
We let go of the rest

har har

2009-07-04T20:50:00.001-07:00

hehe...

i just liked the expression =P

it popped out of the TV while i was reading some stuff for college

'har har thursdays' in Cartoon Network

*though i'm disappointed to say...

it ain't a Cartoon Network anymore...*

so!

as u can tell...

apparently i have some time on my hands

seeing as i've posted 3 straight days

or..

as i like to see it...

i'm just too tired to keep on reading for the 3rd hour

and need a quick break

and since i don't have minesweeper in this pc

and have no wish to have some random msn talk

i'll indulge in writing

about what...

hum...

i can already hear Jesus complaining

*no... not you... the other one...
jeez...
you're not the only Jesus in this planet..*
(~*3*)~

because i can't seem to finish writing the 3rd part of my boyz

but..

i dunno

i'm just not into writing about guyz

so instead

i'll bore the blog with what i've been doing

if you didn't know yet

i've been in Punta Cana since yesterday morning

and am leaving on Monday afternoon [around 6]

which means i have just enough time to read tons

for a college paper that's due Monday [around 4]

and try *keyword being try*

to write something useful

meanwhile

to ease my parents' head

seeing as they think they've paid a 3-night stay

for me to stay in my room and work

so...

today

i went on a bike tour

twice

to also ease my own mind

*cuz my body needs the workout*

i can wrap up my day in these words

wake up-eat-bike-bath-eat-sleep-bike-bath-eat-work

notice the cycle?

and i'm afraid tomorrow will be quite the same

although... i'll probably have to work more

to keep Tetéh from having a stress attack

*she really should leave those to me*

as predicted

my lil bro is off galivanting most of the day

being popular dude on campus

as usual

got 2nd place in the 4th of July tennis tournament

*would've gotten 1st if his head didn't blow up so often, the little prick*

and his hormones seem to be kicking in

FINALLY

as all he talks about and all he sees while we're walking around are

chix chix chix... girls... ladies... chix chix chix

good GOD

it's annoying

my parents are off being...

well..

my parents...

n my poor grams is just being herself

bugging the heck out of me sometimes

but, then again, she wouldn't be her if she didn't

♥

missing the city

missing my friends

missing him

*sorry... couldn't help myself*

worrying my head off...

but then again

wouldn't be me if i didn't... right?

til tomorrow

i guess

weekend soundtrack

2009-07-03T06:39:00.001-07:00

so as i'm crossing by Higuey

i wake up and turn on my iPod

*well, technically it's my dad's iTouch...

it's sad but true, he has an iTouch before me*

so.. ahem... i put on my playlist

which i inserted last night

and proceed to hit the shuffle button

now

i'm not supersticious

not a good believer of luck either

although

my dad says luck = opportunity + preparation

but

i thought it funny that this was the first song to appear

and so

it's become my song for the weekend

along with a couple of others

Asthenia - Blink-182

Last night it came as a picture
With a good reason, a warning sign
This place is void of all passion
If you can imagine it's easy if you try
Believe me I failed this effort
I wrote a reminder this wasn't a vision
This time where are you Houston
Is somebody out there will somebody listen

Should I go back should I go back should I
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I
I hope I won't forget you

My head is made up of memories
Most of them useless delusions
This room is bored of rehearsal
And sick of the boundaries
I miss you so much

Should I go back should I go back should I
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I
This time I don't want to
Should I go back should I go back should I
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I
I hope I won't forget you

Should I go back should I go back should I
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I
This time I don't want to
Should I go back should I go back should I
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I
I hope I won't forget you

btw

amongst this crunch of time

i seem to have forgotten to mention something

GELANY'S HERE!

yes peeps

she arrived just last wednesday

and we've had a blast everyday =]

welcome home grl!~

til the next one

not a girl... not yet a woman XD

2009-07-02T22:54:00.000-07:00

faced yet again with the same problem

i'm no longer 17.... not yet 21

i'm not rushing to join them

but no one wants to join my party of one....

yeh...

boring weekend awaits my friends!

check it out:

http://www.dreamsresorts.com/drepc/

not old enough for the adult crew...

not young enough for the teen crew...

my bro will have a blast

will meet tons of ppl

i will probably meet one... or two...

if i'm brave enough...

but hey... who knows?

maybe everything has changed........

my guyz, part 2

2009-05-18T19:35:00.000-07:00

Yes yes...

by now you must be saying

ANOTHER ONE?!

WASN'T THE FIRST ONE LONG ENOUGH?

i know i know...

but...

as i said before...

i was inspired...

and as this is my blog

and i can do and say whatever i want

here it goes =P

drumroll pleeeease...

part deux!~

now

story goes

that once upon a time

a beautiful girl in her junior year

*that's me... duh*

was wondering what she was to do

as all her classmates did nothing but boring stuff at recess

and... out of nowhere

*seemingly*

came these 6 angels..

*in disguise in the form of 6 freshmen*

now...

you do distinguish the time breach right?

well... the girl's classmates made it their thing

to tease and taunt her about it

but alas... she didn't care

because these angels

made her recess something to look forward to..

and

even though she left school

and when she did the school literally fell apart

leaving her friends to flee to different schools

they still managed to make her smile

whenever they got a chance to talk

and about a month ago

an ever so magical thing happened

they happened to get together again

well... at least 4/6 =P

and met up with the girl

and the girl had a blast

which reminded her of the great times she had in school

thanks to them =]

which is why

today i salute

my guyz

Gabriel Bello.... Sanchez

mr. shy guy

he was one of the last ones to join the crew

but we managed to get a few words out of him every once in a while

n it was totally worth it

the guy with the misterious face and the nice smile!~

Octavio Paradas and Victor Taveras

haha... now...

i mention them together

cuz of their joint effect

these dudes...

found SOMETHING

*different*

to tease each other about

every

single

day

and it was the show of the day

just sitting there watching them

would've given me enough to put this post

yet...

by themselves...

they are the goofiest...

most lovable dudes EVER!

*in the pic... Victor and Jose Luis*

Jose Luis Ovalles... aka... 'The godfather'

*or so he likes to call himself =P*

he's the phylosopher of the group

the abstract thinker

n my moral support when i had any problems at the moment

Julio Felix

achachachaCHAI!

this guy is a piece of work

after our school disbanded

he totally poofed out of sight

and into the world of prissy bilingual schools

eternal basketball star

soccer player extraordinaire

internationally acclaimed judoka

the brain of the group

he was in the lead to becoming the class' valedictorian

*up until they had to switch schools of course*

and when we caught a glimpse of him

cuz he was always playing sports in recess

it was always a good one =]

needless to say

he rounded up a total hunk of a guy

*when he wasn't bugging me or being a total geek*

and even had me falling for a sec ;-)

aaaand... last... but never least...

Mr. Alvin Portorreal

he was also one of the crews newest additions

but he was more outgoing than everyone else i knew

and fit in riiight away

imported all the way from Carmen Maria

*although he now lives in Villa Claudia*

he was the spunk

n my personal commrade in the group

and it might feel a bit cheesy to say...

but since i keep saying that my lil bro will look like him someday...

i feel like his big sis

and tears well up in my eyes as i think that he'll be graduating soon

and actually coming to my college

*along with Julio, Jose Luis and i think Victor

cuz Octavio is going for med school in la pucmm or unibe*

n i can't truly put in words how much i love him =]

of course... they must never hear that i am posting this

as i would just keel over and die... when they see the pix i put up

*which were all taken like... back in 2006 XD*

back when i could still look them in the eye without having to look up

cuz now they've grown strong and tall

and now i feel like the little one next to them

and i feel like the old one hearing them talk college

and girls...

*Julio is practically engaged... part of the reason why we lost him XD*

yet...

i feel a smile creeping up

whenever i think of our little steady lunch date

every day in school

never faltering

always there with a smile

notice Octavio pulling Victor's cap... i told you they didn't stop....

Alvin, Julio, me, Gaby n Victor...

yeh... Octavio n Jose weren't the photogenic type XD

Lisbeth, Jose L., Victor n Julio

*pa que vean.... mis fotos son tan pero tan buenas, que esa salio en la graduacion =P*

til the next one

byez!~

update (July 2, 2009)

my guyz finally graduated....

they are now big guyz on campus...

most of them in my campus

with the exception of Octavio...

congrats guyz!~

my guyz part 1

2009-05-17T21:26:00.000-07:00

so...

i'll be taking my cue from ms. Jezz

but, instead of talking about my grls

cuz of course i'll leave the best for first AND last =]

i'm gonna start by talking of the guyz

now

this might sound a bit queer

but

i will admit

all of these guys have been the love of my life

at some point

and now i'm more than happy to call them

MY guyz

MY best friends

without them

i don't know what i would be today

because there is a bit of each of them in me

and i hope it goes both ways

they've been with me

thru thick and thin

they've been there in my happiest times

but also in my worst

and even though we don't get together

as much as we wish

*different colleges n such*

when we do get together

as we did today

we forget about everything

and focus on us

so in chronological order

i present to you

my guyz:

Nelson

7th grade crush

he was, in my opinion, the smoothest guy in 7th grade

when i met him

he used to be the guy with all the lines

the one who played volleyball with us

while all the other guys were playing basketball

and being 'macho'

he had the best moves

*literally*

which is why he used to be called 'el ken bisbal' xD

yet...

after i got over my first school infatuation

and got the ability to form a coherent sentence around him =P

i found out he was also the

sweetest,

craziest,

most laid back person

in the world

and i mean it

ah... yes...

i almost forgot

my love for liquid tension and dream theater and a perfect circle

blame it on him =]

my knowledge of names such as Mike Portnoy...

Rodney Mullen...

and so on...

blame it on him =]

Eric

8th grade point of absortion

oh god...

i used to be sooo embarrased

cuz here's the thing

eeeeeveryone knew XD

yes, including him.

which made it even worse

the mere sight of him made me mute

it was even tougher

given the fact that he was Nelson's best friend =P

but alas

i eventually got over him

which was one of the best decisions ever!

my gorgeous 'nerdo' of a friend

was taken away from school much to early

right when we were getting to be super friends

he got changed to another school

yet... distance is no obstacle for true friendship

mr. goofy in person

with the heart of an angel

made my high school years much easier

even from a distance

from him

i get the ability to laugh at life

and to be happy with myself

at all times

Manuel

11th grade obsession

i met him at l'alliance francaise

though we never took a course together

until it was a bit too late

see

i was selfish with him

i only wanted him for myself =P

n him..

always so smart

knew better than to let me fall

knowing he wouldn't be here to pick me up

*because he was leaving for the states in summer '06*

but me...

not knowing that

bugged him til no end

cursed him for not letting me be

and we fought

ever so horribly

and lasted 8... eternal... months

without speaking to each other

stupid me

i saw the errors in me way too late

and i didn't get to say goodbye.

to this date

i haven't seen him since about 3 months before he left

yet... as i said before...

distance is no obstacle

i don't know how he found it in him

to let our quarrels be a thing of the past

yet...

i don't think he knows how much i thank him for that

because he's been my unconditional friend

ever since

from him i get my patience

my understanding

my Tool, my Placebo, my Nine Inch Nails, my Staind...

and so many more...

my ability to love from the distance

i get from him =]

Jose E. Duran

aka Chewbacca.... aka Bubaloo...

12th grade infatuation

met him at my school's '06 prom

now

i think he was one of the first guys

i ever talked to so openly

about my actual infatuation =P

he taught me

how to handle myself

with him *duh*

and with other guys

and i still keep learning

every day

new things from him

the way i am

with any of my male friends

the way i am

with my boyfriend

it's because of him =P

he gave me street smart

he gave me skate smart

he gave me Rufio, Yellowcard, Goldfinger, Plan B...

most importantly

he gave me one of the best friends i could ever ask for

himself =]

mr. spunk, mr. coolness, mr. creativity in person

he has the innate ability of making me smile

no matter the circunstance

no matter the time

plus. he gave me my psych guru

his sister =D

Bryan

simply timeless

now

this guy

i can't put it in words

he is

my brother

almost by blood

story goes

my dad met his parents in the 6th grade

our parents worked together thru 17 years in codetel

we lived yard to yard

got put in the same school

and even though i changed schools...

i ended up back with him again xD

and to boot... we're in the same college =P

were born weeks apart

n even our little brothers were born weeks apart =P

this guy

is truly undescribable

from him

i get my late blooming faith in God

my flow

rap and hip-hop

it's all him

God must have known

that i wouldn't have been able to choose

between them

so he saved me the trouble in thinking

and just gave them the answers

and the recipe to make them my best friends

by this point...

my memories are drowning me

so is my lack of sleep

so...

'til the next one...

i leave you with these pix....

of me n my drummer, my nerdo, my skater...

my supermen...

my lifeguards =]

2007

2008

2009

lov ya!

byez!~

coward or not?

2009-04-24T18:16:00.000-07:00

do you think i'm being a coward if....

i didn't want to go cuz....

i don't wanna see them, in their paralel universe...

all having fun and getting along and chilling...

and those two looking like nothing could fase them...

*one... i think... not aware of what is really going on*

while i have to watch on...

in this petty little universe

and do nothing about it

and say nothing about it

cuz there's 'nothing wrong with it'

cuz 'nothing's happened yet'

cuz if i say something i might crack the beautiful image of us

and the mental scheme everyone has

cuz 'i've never imagined you any other way'

cuz 'i met you and you were already like that'

now... am i a coward...

too afraid to make the step and face on the consequences

hear the same talk we had one year n so ago....

just to end up noticing i really am a coward

cuz even if we have that talk

everything would go back to what it was

and i would still feel the same way when everyone notices...

and asks me.... 'what's up with them?'

and i can't say a word.

cuz i'm too embarrassed to tell..

to admit it.

because i would be shouting out loud

'I AM A COWARD! i have low self esteem and i'm stuck in this routine'

*rimo xD!*

i would be saying i don't do anything cuz i fear the consequences would be good

excellent even...

for everybody but myself.

so yes

i declare myself a coward

and a selfish person

for keeping it to myself

and maybe not letting it be the 'way it should be'

and for not letting everybody... but me...

be as happy as they can be

i'm gonna keep repeating myself

that there's nothing i can do

whenever someone asks me 'what's up?'

to comfort myself for as long as i can

til the bubble bursts

and i fully can't take it anymore

til then

i'll be asking myself everytime i'm in a situation like that

'when will the bubble burst?'

'when will my time be up?'

'when will i stop lying to myself and everyone around that knows?'

til then

i'll be a coward

sad, sad excuse

2009-04-08T15:52:00.000-07:00

Yes...

I'm a sad excuse for a blogger...

but, an excuse after all xD

Just to bring you up to speed on my last few... months of life:

- I'm now 19 years old xD

- I am now working in New Horizons school as a teacher's assistant in Pre-First (english) and First (spanish).... they have this weird bilingual method... poor kids *dunno if i mentioned that i was working in a pre-school in Las Praderas like 2 weeks before taking this job xD, but it payed literally half of what this job is paying... plus i feel like i'm actually teaching in this one... (i was working with one year olds in the old job... changing diapers and putting them to sleep n such)*

- Still working in the Dominico

- Not working in Intec anymore (y cuando?!)

- Now in my 7th trimester of my career (10th week of it... almost DONE!)

- Planning my summer trip to the states which includes:

* Atlanta (Jezz)

* Boston (Gelz)

* New York (Lissette n STRAND! =D)

* New Jersey (my uncle)

* n last, yet never least, Pennsylvania (Grams n Nayely)

- Mom's away til the 14th in the US, went to check out my family's newest addition *pic at the end*

- Started therapy (no i'm not crazy....) a couple of weeks ago... had to do it as a part of my career *i'm supposed to take 6 sessions of therapy so the shrink can verify i am indeed not crazy and/or sane enough to be a psychologist myself*

- My swiss sister Katia visited us for 2 weeks in february... had a blast!

- My grams moved back to Carmen Maria *far as hell* taking her away from right next door to my job =(

- Still got the same boyfriend..... rough patch gone (YaY!).. happy time lasted a bundle of weeks...(great!) til yesterday: our 1 year-8 month anniversary when we got into a nice fight hasta el sol de hoy (darn it!)

- Same friends (love 'em =D)

And that's basically it...

boring, huh?

Anywho...

as i said before

i'm finishing this trimester next week

(although i have one class that'll take up some vacation time)

so i'm now wrapped up in a bunch of classwork

and i'm babysitting my little cousins

while their mom is away with mine in NY

so i'll just wrap this up with a pic of the newest addition to our family:

Merlis Garcia

and a poem of Mario Benedetti

*cosmic thing actually...

... i had to do an expo on him in one of my classes

and i'd say that this poem describes my feelings towards him perfectly right now:

Tengo miedo de verte

necesidad de verte

esperanza de verte

desazones de verte.

Tengo ganas de hallarte

preocupación de hallarte

certidumbre de hallarte

pobres dudas de hallarte.

Tengo urgencia de oírte

alegría de oírte

buena suerte de oírte

y temores de oírte.

o sea,

resumiendo

estoy jodido

y radiante

quizá más lo primero

que lo segundo

y también

viceversa.

My mom feeding Merlis the day after she was born =)

byez!~

soon...

2009-01-24T14:06:00.000-08:00

Come along it is the break of day
Surely now, you'll have some things to say
It's not the time for telling tales on me

So come along, it wont be long
'Til we return happy
Shut your eyes, there are no lies
In this world we call sleep
Let's desert this day of hurt
Tomorrow we'll be free

Let's not fight I'm tired can't we just sleep tonight
Don't Turn away it's just there's nothing left here to say
Turn around I know we're lost but soon we'll be found

Well it's been rough but we'll be just fine
Work it out yeah we'll survive
You mustn't let a few bad times dictate

and yellowcard brings me down

2009-01-10T15:44:00.000-08:00

Here, A little sympathy for you to waste on me
I know you're faking it but that's okay
And I don't want to drag it out
Don't want to bring you down
I never wanted it to end this way

Here, A little jealousy
I hope you think of me
Hope you wonder where I sleep at night
Cause I feel like I'm inside out
You got me upside down
Maybe I was holding on too tight

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I can tell that you don't know me anymore

It's easy to forget, sometimes we just forget
And being on this road is anything but sure
Maybe we'll forget, I hope we don't forget

I'm falling into memories of you,and things we used to do
Follow me there
A beautiful somewhere
A place that I can share with you

So many nights, legs tangled tight
Wrap me up in a dream with you
Close up these eyes, try not to cry
All that I've got to pull me through is memories of you

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You are me
Our worst disaster would be waking up alone
Now we're free
We're drifting out
Like all the ones we didn't know
I wait for a silence here
I wait for things to disappear
Wait for the ground to stop moving underneath my only fear
If I lose you I don't know

More than ever
I need to feel you
It's all around
More than ever
I see the real you
And it surrounds

Everything, everything
We have had
Out of sight out of mind
Given that
What I see when I dream
Hurts like hell and back

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Of all of the places I've looked
And all of the pictures I took

*i love samana*
One of them's here with me now
I'm finally finding out how, sure, things, fall
All sure things fall

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

I work all day
For one more day that I can say I'm all alone
I just need time and I will say what I believe and I'll come home

As life flies by
I'm not sure how I'm gonna do this all again
So line by line I write this down and I'm just trying to find the end

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I think I'm breaking out
I'm gonna leave you now
Theres nothing for me here, it's all the same
And even though I know
That everything might go
Go downhill from here, I'm not afraid

Way away away from here I'll be
Way away away so you can see
How it feels to be alone and not believe
Feels to be alone and not believe anything

Letting out the noise inside of me
Every window pane is shattering
Cutting up my words before I speak
This is how it feels to not believe

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lie in this empty bed
With this aching head
You left me here this morning
Now I can't remember why
I let you in again
To get under my skin
And every time you disappear
I remember

How I look for you
But I can't see your face
And then I hear you
The only thing you say...

I am afraid right now
I don't wanna let you down
And I am the one who
can't be saved

Why do we keep this up?
Why do we live like us?
When there is nothing left to save
Will you be afraid?

I am afraid right now
You already let me down

=====================================================

*just for the fun of it*

She likes vampires and hit list radio
But turns it off when she hears this one song she knows
And you breathe the windows down

pix n flix n stix

Chronicle of a failed launch

ahem...

*deep self-satisfied sigh*

College work and graduations

Tell The Truth Tuesday

Oh Blogger where art thou?

hey there...

YouTubing..

ARC's, ARC's and other bookish stuff...

Do the write thing for Nashville!

Honorary Caster Girl =)

TGIT

Quick and painless... hopefully

Squeelage and authors appreciation Kami&Margie

Tell The Truth Tuesday

Author Appreciation Week - JK Rowling and Ann Brashares

could it be true?

Inspiring vlog...

Grey's Anatomy

Unlock the curse

there are 20 years to go....

Cattel's 16 personality factors *and them some*

tweet peeps

lucky

Lightning comes, goes

my human development test: old age and grief

Final hell week playlist

because we both deserve a good chap :)

i'm going to burst.

Relationships, quotes and wonderings of a knowledgable but foolish mind

Modesty, Holmes, Men and Settling

paranoid =/

Quote

'I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience ...-- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death.' - Robert Fulghum.

how to decided who to marry XD!!! PLOP!

over my head.

ishh....

aaaaaaahhhh =]

Once again talking to Jacob wannabe

soundtrack of my weekend ♪

what i learned in class today

doomsday! :O

got it!~

Gratitude & Love rarely go hand in hand

Olvidate

Tribus urbanas! ufff!!!

july 30th

yadda yadda yadda

que trozo de cancion!!!

take over, the break's over!

more songs

har har

weekend soundtrack

not a girl... not yet a woman XD

my guyz, part 2

my guyz part 1

coward or not?

sad, sad excuse

soon...

and yellowcard brings me down

deep self-satisfied sigh

Cattel's 16 personality factors and them some